Masculinity

Being a Man is Fundamentally about Responsibility.

I will free-write about life and explore some exciting questions that have passed through my mind today. Many shows and people mention how we are mostly wrong about our view of the world, what we know, etc., and how our minds view and react to the world might not be ideal for the world’s current reality.

Photo by Austin Loveing on Unsplash

Man has evolved, and here I am not talking about the origin of life or that we have evolved from the monkeys or apes, but rather how we have adapted to the world as it changes.

Recently, the pace of change in our society has been so rapid that our biological evolution has struggled to keep up. A few influential voices drive positive and negative changes, shaping the world’s expectations of our behaviour and reactions.

Today, my thoughts centre on the personal concept of masculinity and its evolution.

We live in a world where, with the fast-paced change, what being a man means might have changed by the time you need to be a man from when you were taught and socialized.

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So then, what are the basic principles of being a man or a woman? What is the essence of that definition that does not change with time and advances in the world? Remember that roles, traditional or modern, are not the definitions. Those will evolve and change.

We live in a world where women are more educated and sometimes make more money than men, and thus, a man being the provider might no longer hold. In the ancient days, it was about their physical strength, making them the hunters and the protectors of the home. Their bodily attributes had a more outstanding contribution to their manhood.

Nowadays, although these remain accurate, most of the protection a family needs is financial security, which has been the more recent definition of a man when women take care of the home. Men made money, thus providing economic security.

Today, both men and women work, and thus man is lost. What makes them a man? What makes them the protectors, if that is the definition of being a man?

With the absence of all these — the need for financial and physical protection — a new wave of toxic masculinity has come in. It’s where men aim to dominate women by working out and being well-built physically, making tons of money, driving big cars, moving around with girls and flaunting all these as a validation of their masculinity.

All these stem from our lack of an understanding of what makes a man. Defining by their strength, money, women, or physique is flawed and often leads to toxicity and abuse.

I look at being a man as fundamentally about responsibility. It’s about owning your actions, fulfilling your duties, and providing for your family or dependents. It’s about leading, learning, and understanding your dependant’s needs, and taking responsibility for meeting them. It’s about being the visionary and ultimately responsible. It’s about being true to yourself, not as the world wants you to be, but as you truly are.

Ultimately, being a man is about being responsible, honourable, authentic, and true to yourself.