I run
I am getting older
But sometimes I feel the same
Puberty’s almost over
And I wonder what has changed
I’m barely any bigger
The same goes for my boobs
I have a few more breakouts
And a little bit more pubes
Ewww
Can you imagine
Having hair as white as snow
A wrinkly face
A short, curved back
And maybe broken toe?
But sitting in the
same chair
Same bed
wearing the same clothes
As I have been these last couple years
Bring unexpected woes
Cuz even with the painted walls
The posters, and new shoes
It feels like 2020 even though its ‘22
I work the same jobs
Drive the same car
Have I really come that far in life?
No duh! Of course! …Right?
It’s funny how change can bring uncertainty and pain
But I look the other way and not a day has gone by
I’m sure this ain’t forever —
Ya girl’s only 18
But it doesn’t seem fair for the amount of anxiety I’ve seen
I thought it was ‘bout the future
But she seems to be fine?
Yet I still find myself tripping
Over invisible lines
Something else I’ve noticed is that I’ve seemed to’ve lost my edge
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From memory to eyesight
It’s been thrown to the hedge
Or something!
What the heck is going on!
Does this mean Imma “Full-fledged adult!”
Does it last my whole life long?
What will become of me?
Will my ashes grow a tree?
Will I live to 85
Or only 33?
On second thought maybe the thoughts
Do not belong to me
Gotta just live each day, one by one
In order to be free
Though it feels I’ve lived a lifetime
Made memories to last
I have this subtle feeling
That it’s gonna go too fast
It makes me feel a little scared
But also that’s okay
In fact, it is a blessing
When I wake to see each day
Perhaps it’s the heat
Or the day outside at noon
That makes it feel like I’ve gone back — — at least isn’t June
I’ve cried much more since last year
Made so many new friends
Undeniably stronger,
I won’t be the same again
Is this what I was afraid of?
I know it ain’t gon’ stop
Time will a spinning
Till the day my brains go POP!
Or however the end comes
So fly into the sun
Faster and faster and faster still
I do all I can
I run
