Mallory > Mallory's Quotes

“That's what I love about reading: one tiny thing will interest you in a book, and that tiny thing will lead you to another book, and another bit there will lead you onto a third book. It's geometrically progressive - all with no end in sight, and for no other reason than sheer enjoyment.”
― Mary Ann Shaffer, The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society

“Bond reflected that good Americans were fine people and that most of them seemed to come from Texas.”
― Ian Fleming, Casino Royale

“Ask me if I sparkle and I’ll kill you where you stand.” (Bones)”
― Jeaniene Frost, This Side of the Grave

“Some people say, “Never let them see you cry.” I say, if you’re so mad you could just cry, then cry. It terrifies everyone.”
― Tina Fey, Bossypants

“Gay people don’t actually try to convert people. That’s Jehovah’s Witnesses you’re thinking of.”
― Tina Fey, Bossypants

“By the way, when Oprah Winfrey is suggesting you may have overextended yourself, you need to examine your fucking life.”
― Tina Fey, Bossypants

“I feel about Photoshop the way some people feel about abortion. It is appalling and a tragic reflection on the moral decay of our society…unless I need it, in which case, everybody be cool.”
― Tina Fey

“Obviously, as an adult I realize this girl-on-girl sabotage is the third worst kind of female behavior, right behind saying "like" all the time and leaving your baby in a dumpster.”
― Tina Fey, Bossypants

“A coworker at SNL dropped an angry c-bomb on me and i had the weirdest reaction. To my surprise, I blurted, "No. You don't get to call me that. My parents love me. I'm not some Adult Child of an Alcoholic that's going to take that shit.”
― Tina Fey, Bossypants

“I only hope that one day I can frighten my daughter this much. Right now, she's not scared of my husband or me at all. I think it's a problem. I was a freshman home from college the first time my dad said, "You're going out at ten p.m.? I don't think so," and I just laughed and said, "It's fine." I feel like my daughter will be doing that to me by age six.

How can I give her what Don Fey gave me? The gift of anxiety. The fear of getting in trouble. The knowledge that while you are loved, you are not above the law. The Worldwide Parental Anxiety System is failing if this many of us have made sex tapes.”
― Tina Fey, Bossypants

“This made no sense to me, probably because I speak English and have never had a head injury.”
― Tina Fey, Bossypants

“What Turning Forty Means to Me

I need to take my pants off as soon as I get home. I didn't used to have to do that. But now I do.”
― Tina Fey, Bossypants

“Surround yourself with human beings, my dear James. They are easier to fight for than principles.”
― Ian Fleming, Casino Royale

“Bond always mistrusted short men. They grew up from childhood with an inferiority complex. All their lives they would strive to be big - bigger than the others who had teased them as a child. Napoleon had been short, and Hitler. It was the short men that caused all the trouble in the world.”
― Ian Fleming

“I love new clothes. If everyone could just wear new clothes everyday, I reckon depression wouldn’t exist anymore.”
― Sophie Kinsella, Confessions of a Shopaholic

“There is no sunrise so beautiful that it is worth waking me up to see it.”
― Mindy Kaling, Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me?

“You should know I disagree with a lot of traditional advice. For instance, they say the best revenge is living well. I say it’s acid in the face—who will love them now?”
― Mindy Kaling, Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me?

“Teenage girls, please don’t worry about being super popular in high school, or being the best actress in high school, or the best athlete. Not only do people not care about any of that the second you graduate, but when you get older, if you reference your successes in high school too much, it actually makes you look kind of pitiful, like some babbling old Tennessee Williams character with nothing else going on in her current life. What I’ve noticed is that almost no one who was a big star in high school is also big star later in life. For us overlooked kids, it’s so wonderfully fair.”
― Mindy Kaling, Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me?

“Sometimes you just have to put on lip gloss and pretend to be psyched.”
― Mindy Kaling, Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me?

“In my mind, the sexiest thing in the world is the feeling that you’re wanted.”
― Mindy Kaling, Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me?

“As my mom has said, when one person is unhappy, it usually means two people are unhappy but that one has not come to terms with it yet.”
― Mindy Kaling, Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me?

“All women love Colin Firth: Mr. Darcy, Mark Darcy, George VI—at this point he could play the Craigslist Killer and people would be like, 'Oh my God, the Craigslist Killer has the most boyish smile!”
― Mindy Kaling, Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me?

“So I’m into men now, even though they can be frightening. I want a schedule-keeping, waking-up-early, wallet-carrying, non-Velcro-shoe-wearing man.”
― Mindy Kaling, Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me?

“I don't want to be married just to be married. I can't think of anything lonelier than spending the rest of my life with someone I can't talk to, or worse, someone I can't be silent with.”
― Mary Ann Shaffer, The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society

“Men are more interesting in books than they are in real life.”
― Mary Ann Shaffer, The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society

“Never say 'no' to adventures.”
― Ian Fleming, Chitty Chitty Bang Bang

“I think it's the same with all the relationships between a man and a woman. They can survive anything so long as some kind of basic humanity exists between the two people. When all kindness has gone, when one person obviously and sincerely doesn't care if the other is alive or dead, then it's just no good.

-- from Quantum of Solace”
― Ian Fleming, For Your Eyes Only

“Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence. Three times is enemy action”
― Ian Fleming, Goldfinger

“Lucifer's bouncing balls, Kitten, not again!”
― Jeaniene Frost, Halfway to the Grave

“Don't kiss me like a woman if you're going to treat me like a child.”
― Jeaniene Frost, Halfway to the Grave