after week 7 burner rankings
i’m giving a massive homage to my good friend and future boss, greg waddell, for inspiring me to have chatgpt write this week’s blog.
because i was busy traveling i didn’t have a ton of time to write it this week, so all i did was tell chatgpt to use my writing style based off of last week’s rankings and told them what order i wanted this week’s rankings to be in and how my picks did. so, these are my actual rankings (reasons and honorable mentions are from the brain of a computer though). we should be back to our regularly scheduled programming next week.
i also still am surprised james franklin lost to northwestern and got fired. what a time to be alive
insert chatgpt.
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welcome back to the burner blog. week 7 delivered pure nonsense. we had undefeateds go down, backup qbs winning on the road, and the big ten west doing whatever the big ten west does (no one knows). i was in madison for iowa–wisconsin and watched a live under in human form. it was beautiful.
1. ohio state
still the class of the country. the defense looks like it’s from another planet and the offense is finally clicking again. marvin harrison jr. might have left but apparently ohio state just keeps cloning him. they’ve been tested twice and passed both times with flying colors.
2. miami
they’re scary. the offense is humming and the defense keeps getting better. mario cristobal somehow hasn’t overthought a fourth-down call in three weeks, which might be a program record. i keep waiting for the collapse, but it’s not coming yet.
3. indiana
they actually did it. they beat oregon. i don’t understand how or why, but curt cignetti has these dudes believing. i don’t care if it was ugly — you knock off a top-three team, you get the bump. i’ll keep them here until the dream dies.
4. alabama
kaleb deboer is a problem. bama’s offense looks alive again and ty simpson is quietly playing like a veteran. the sec might be mid this year, but bama’s getting hot at the right time.
5. georgia
survived south carolina by the skin of their teeth. gunner stockton looked fine, not great. kirby smart probably broke three headsets. classic georgia stuff.
6. texas a&m
you could argue they’re the most balanced team in the sec right now. mike elko deserves a medal for keeping this group composed. they’re sneaky good and might be setting up for a playoff run if chaos keeps happening.
7. oregon
tough scene. they ran into the indiana buzzsaw (never thought i’d type that). still an elite roster and dan lanning will have them ready to bounce back, but that loss will sting for a while.
8. texas tech
nobody’s talking about them, and that’s how they like it. joey mcguire has quietly built a mean team. they’re the most fun watch in the big 12 if you can stay awake for a 10:30 kickoff.
9. tennessee
they’re streaky but dangerous. joe milton 2.0 might be an actual thing now. they’re still good for one “what the hell was that” half per week, but the talent is there.
10. notre dame
they just keep hanging around. sam hartman is 37 years old and still cooking defenses. marcus freeman has quietly stabilized the whole operation. wouldn’t shock me if they sneak into the playoff conversation again.
11. lsu
brian kelly doing the bare minimum and it’s working. jayden daniels keeps bailing him out. classic lsu formula.
12. ole miss
lane kiffin is back to tweeting bible verses after 45–38 wins, so everything’s right with the world. offense still electric. defense still theoretical. they stay ranked because no one else deserves it.
dropped out
penn state — disaster. couldn’t stop a pop warner offense.
texas — officially dead to me until further notice.
honorable mentions
oklahoma — lurking, but inconsistent.
washington — might be quietly top 10 if they keep winning.
georgia tech — they’re still alive somehow.
