Capital Letters
James Bond, little dears, is Licensed to Kill,
when is seen as a Good Thing. Take notes.
What the Government blesses you needn’t confess,
which is Tidy, and no victim floats
forever. Be clever, and you too can fill
your martini and Ruling Class coffers.
If you’re handsome as well, you’ll get, what the hell,
You will get seven years’ offing offers.
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Class Notes (FOR TEACHERS ONLY!): Have the children discuss what is to be learned from this topic. Encourage them to notice and appreciate the important things presented, such as the repeated use of an ending apostrophe to denote the possessive. Stimulate discussion of why (and if necessary, which) letters in the text are capitalised and underscore the statute of limitations. In the unlikely event that interest lags after the fourth or fifth reading, ask your pupils to relate what they personally would do (or have done) to get to drive a Tidy. Should any of them express moral rectitude or repugnance, do not berate them because such trait-evidencing is almost always nurture/nature baggage that they bring into the school with them, rather than acquire in the classroom, you must hope. Do ask them to find out and tell you where their parents live. Relay the information to your school policy tenure advisor.
© ‘Lessons for My Babies’, Alan Reynolds
