UPDATE FOR MY FOLLOWERS
Thank you all sooo much
🌹Thank you all SO much for your continued support and encouragement…your kind, compassionate comments have made such a difference in my current situation. If I’m slow to answer, it’s because I have new physical injuries on top of what I was already trying to heal from.
🥀 I’m still hosting my writing challenge…and still publishing new entries. I love that sooooo much!!! But I need to explain just how incredibly difficult things are for me right now.
🥀 It’s sadly ironic, because I’ve always loved October. It’s such a mystical time, and on a really good year, the unbearable heat finally begins to cool down and the leaves change into gorgeous colors. It’s so joyous and magical. But unfortunately this year, October is not being very kind to me. I’m having a really rough time right now. I was already really struggling, and now things are even worse.
So much for the month I look forward to the most.
This year it’s Craptober. Copyright 2026 by Anaelle.
🥀 What I’m about to share is an explanation of everything going on right now. I’m not trying to complain and I definitely don’t want anyone’s pity. I don’t know how to explain without sounding like I’m complaining or ranting, so my apologies in advance.
🥀My mom had to go to the ER this past week. Another blood vessel burst. She has a brain aneurysm, do that’s very serious. She just got over a bad virus…and now this. It coincided with my new severe injuries. The universe apparently has a malicious sense of humor.
🥀I’m still trying my best to find joy and wonder, despite everything. There HAVE been some happy moments. I’m indulging in as much self-care as possible (and even THAT is incredibly difficult because of the physical pain). I miss my walks. I miss the beautiful weather. And I feel guilty because I feel like I’m wasting precious time. I feel guilty because I can’t do what I need to do.
🥀 Everything is just so difficult; this past summer was horrible. A drought for the third summer in a row, which is unprecedented for where I live. It was unbearably hot and humid for over seven months. (Which unfortunately is the norm for this region. But combined with a drought, it’s extra miserable). The house is literally falling down around me. Then, on the first anniversary of a devastating loss (plus the 4th anniversary of my sudden debilitating injuries-- courtesy of the alcoholic relative), my adopted grandmother was suddenly rushed to the ER. She was in intensive care for weeks. The doctor said she was getting better, and could go home soon. But she suddenly took a turn for the worst, and a few days later she died. There was the funeral, plus the funeral of two other relatives who died that same week.
🥀My mom was overexerting herself throughout the whole ordeal. Like I said earlier: she has a brain aneurysm and isn’t supposed to be straining herself. Despite that, she was overexerting herself in multiple ways. I was stuck at home with a monstrous alcoholic the whole time.
🥀 About a month ago, I had a horrible vision of my mom dying. That scares me senseless because I’m a medium. I was born with these abilities (definitely something I never deliberately chose). The visions I’ve previously had were all accurate. And unfortunately, she DID just have a really close call this past week when another blood vessel abruptly burst.
🥀So I know I need to get moved into my new tiny home before the inevitable happens. And there’s a lot I need to care of, just in case. Because once my mom is gone, that’s it for me. I hate that my injuries are this debilitating, and I’ve been trying to find a way to improve the pain so I can do more things again.
🥀Right now I’m just trying to survive the intolerable pain from these new injuries. My left knee is also injured now, and it feels feverish. I honestly can’t believe this was all initially caused by the actions of an alcoholic relative. Before he caused those sudden series of emergencies a few years ago, the neck injuries I’d had since childhood had finally gotten better. I was getting specialized chiropractic that had drastically improved my injuries so much, that the pain was minimal. I was in the brink of achieving a lifelong dream. It took years of specialized chiropractic and took all the money my mom and I had, but my injuries were at least 60 percent better. My mom was doing really well too. It’s terrifying how rapidly things can change without any warning.
🥀People look at me and can’t see the injuries, so they can’t begin to comprehend what it’s like not to do simple everyday things. They can’t even begin to imagine not having their busy schedules and social lives. I don’t miss any of that. I just want to be able to do normal things again, like go outside to take a walk. I always loved walking in the twilight.
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🥀I was feeling a little better after several sessions of PT. But that didn’t last long. Just when things started to seem a little better, my mom inevitably collapsed. She caught a bad virus. After weeks of being sick, she finally felt well enough to take me to physical therapy again. It had been over six weeks since my last session and I was in horrible pain from trying to pack a few boxes by myself.
🥀Unfortunately, the PT exerted way too much pressure (I kept asking him to stop because he was hurting me). He said the technique would make me feel a lot better. He wasn’t taking my previous injuries into account, and didn’t realize that he was only doing further damage. He injured my back horribly. It’s been almost two weeks and the pain has gotten worse. I’m afraid he fractured some vertebrae, or caused spinal disc damage. I don’t have the money to go to the doctor.
🥀My poor mom is on a very tiny monthly income. She can’t afford to keep paying my expenses. Plus now she’s recovering from the burst blood vessels.
I was trying to find writing or editing work at home, right before my new injuries. Maybe something will work out. Throughout my life, things always worked out when I needed it most. I can’t believe that magic is gone. It HAS to still be there.
🥀 It’s just really hard to believe thst right now. I was already dealing with more than anyone should ever have to. Now I’m in more pain than ever before. I’m concerned about serious damage, and also really worried about my mom.
I was supposed to have moved long before now. It’s been one delay after another.
🥀 Through all of this, I’ve still been trying my best. Despite the excruciating agony, I’ll still clap for people and leave enthusiastic heartfelt comments. Many of these people don’t bother to reciprocate. I can’t understand people like that. It’s just not something my mind can comprehend. (But that rant is for a different post).
🥀With all the above being being said: I’m not getting a lot of my notifications. I’m experiencing a lot of weird glitches. (Yeah…. AGAIN). And I’m really, REALLY struggling right now. If I accidentally forget to answer comments, or if I inadvertently miss comments and claps, I apologize. I also apologize if I’m slow to answer or reciprocate. I’ve always suffered from insomnia, and needless to say, I’m in so much pain that my insomnia is even worse. I can barely sit up. It’s excruciating to turn over while trying to sleep. It hurts just to breathe. I’m NOT writing any of this to complain. I’m just being very honest about my current situation. And now I desperately need to rest. I type lying down, and even that is extremely painful right now.
🌹 My heartfelt thanks to those of you who continue to be so kind, supportive and encouraging. You don’t know how much that means to me. I’m not sure I could have gotten through these past couple of years without you. Many people whom I thought were my Medium friends have long since forgotten about me. Some have betrayed me. But a few of you have remained throughout everything (even my rants). 😂 I consider you my friends, kindred spirits, and soul family. I appreciate you all so very, very much. With love, gratitude and blessings…
— Anaelle 🌹✨🕊️🩷
A fun Halloween poem:
My latest magical story:
And my spooktacular writing challenge:
✨🩷 Thank you for your gift of 50 claps. I love you, soul fam!! 🩷✨
