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Rascal Cruciferous

2 min readJan 17, 2025

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I am not a “veggie” … pronounced with that cloying tone of certain human voices.

I am a Punk Purple Specie that can go in the depths of your intestines and negotiates a juicy deal with your gut bacteria and as a result make you feel like a superb vital star.

But for that to happen, you must eat me!

Oh yeah, I am this scrappy old school ragged pirate of the infamous cruciferous gang.

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Botanists have made portraits of me, and I have showed up in uncountable books and human papers and yet…I yearn for hanging out with one human group in particular that resembles my irreverent soul: that of the human children. Those who are abrasively honest and spit you out if they dislike you.

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Got to figure it out how to get to them…

A carrot told me to not even try because I don’t have what they love: sweet spiky sugar!

True, true… but I can roll like a ball in the kitchen before you eat me, you can peel me off leaf by leaf as a frustration de-escalation practice (how fancy), my purpleness allures painters, my intricacies defy boredom of flat textures, and I can even be, at times, the facilitator for a fart party.

So…what do you say, child?

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Finn
Finn

Written by Finn

Love keeper, life pilgrim.