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There is Nothing Foreign About This “Indian Experience”

Examining underlying cause of the problem written about in the CNN post that went viral.

5 min readAug 22, 2013

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So in the past few day this post on CNN Site describing the horrors of a women who was travelling through India went viral on many forums, including among Indians on Facebook. While a majority recognized what the post wanted to convey, a significant percentage nevertheless called out the women for standing out.

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It is this what fears me for there is, I repeat nothing “Foreign” about this experience, ask around people, if you can’t — look on Quora for one, you will find that this is something Indian women go through so regularly that it is not even considered beyond normal. I do agree that “rarity” of a female, someone quite different from the ones they are used to assaulting would have made them more excited, but the fact remains that the core of the issue has nothing to do with the ethinicity of the female.

Ask around and you will find that almost each and every girl has had one of these experiences herself, but sadly “This is water”, something the Indian crowd has gotten so used to that it no longer makes news.

The most obvious, important realities are often the ones hardest to see and talk about — David Foster Wallace

So please if you do read this, don’t bother to think that it was because she was of a different ethnicity all this happened, it is NOT. The only reason this happened was because she was at the same place these people were, and she just seemed to be a different cuisine.

At the heart of this problem lies two issues, two issues that contribute largely to this whole issue. The first one has been talked about by a professor of mine in malayalam here, and I attempted a translation on Quora.

She cannot be a friend

A large percentage of the Indian population for some reason, takes pride to, once children grow beyond an age to seperate them on the basis on gender, and the girl is probably not to be seen. For from the start of puberty she has to be “taken care” to be unspoilled goods to be sold to the person with the highest standing, along with cupious amounts of gold and property.

So once a child is starting to both think for themselves, and to go through puberty, s/he no longer has a proper friend of the opposite gender. The one single relationship that could have remained between equals is not taken away. From there on , all the boys hear are that “Good boys don’t go behind girls”. And all the girls hear are “Stay away from the boys you don’t want to be impure”.

There is this particular part from the article that describes the situation from then on

there were no sex signals, only women’s bodies to be taken, or hidden away.

From there on to the point the men and women become mature , a lot has changed, women have now been transformed from “Childhood friends” to an “opportunity to score”. Hence this young lady, given that she was “different”, became an immense opportunity for people to score.

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The patriarchy is so deeply imbibed that this was supposedly (yet to verify this but the source is known for posting accurately) standard material a few years ago in Rajasthani Schools.

Relevant lesson from Rajasthani Text Book

Ram eat Kheer
Sita work

Bhuvan go to the school
Get taught by the teacher

Geeta bring water
Serve food for Dad

Madan play in the garden
Meena, help Mom

Ram, Bhuvan and Madan are typical boy names in India, while Sita, Geeta, and Meena are typical girl names.

All this means that there is no equal footing, and in such a situation it is not surprising that men feel a kind of “sexual entitlement” from the women.

Also to add at this point is the general tendency of the “Indian Middle Class and the Elite” to blame the poor for all such activities, they will point out the fact that all the people that are mentioned in the article are probably poor.

The biggest problem here I see is that while the observation may be true (the middle class and the rich indulge in other off the street sexual assault), the reason they do this is not because they are poor, it is because of how underdeveloped the community is. It is because of how little external education has penetrated that community. A large part of this community has been purposefully kept away from education because it will hurt a lot of things for the ones in power. They still believe what has been handed down to them, and quite understandably the ones doing that are not the best friends of treating anyone with equality and respect. So pardon me if you blame the poor, and it does not seem convincing to me.

Also to note is that the reduction is also because of “social status” issues in other sections of the society, not because they do believe in equality.

Successful Trial Runs

It is hard for me to assume that the first assault someone does is as brazen as some of the activities mentioned in the article, or reported in the news. The start of the activities is often very small, and these activities are usually the evolution of the small assaults they got away with. For example if we are to talk about the amount of groping or unwanted touching that happens in crowded public transport well it would just be every other person. Oh wait, there are often cases of even men being subjected to these in a crowded bus, and given how crowded most buses get, it also gives them a convenient opportunity to do this, but usually the one getting assaulted always knows.

The reason I wrote this article is because a lot of people in the wake of this have been talking about “reverse cultural shock” and “non cosmpolitan environment” in India, but I don’t think that is the matter. I don’t think India has a non-cosmopolitan environment, because for me most of the problems “foriegners” report in India, are not really unique to them, other than the intensity (1000 buck cheating for them, 100 buck cheating for us. Everyone stares at you for them, few people stare at you for us) the problem often has nothing to do with them being not from India.

P.S : Yes I have read this article, and I do agree that most Indian men are not rapists, or assaulters, but the point is that the root cause that causes this (the first point) is but surprisingly there with a large large percentage of the Indian population, and that is why I wrote this..

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