It is already halfway now.
June has passed now. It means we have already survived half a year. Full of roller coaster, obviously.
I don’t know where to start this reflection or yap.
First, I decided to continue to write my second book. Since it’s hard to find a job. I know it’s not just me who finds it hard to get one. Many people are still struggling too. But not everyone has a second plan or got the second door to try another thing. I published my first book for my final project. I know that not sell very well, because I did not know how to promote the book. Since the novel was my alternative way to graduate. Not using undergraduate thesis, but I chose a creative thing. Thanks to Pak Nadiem Makarim, actually. I wouldn’t have experienced the process without having other choices, not just making a thesis.
Second, I felt something empty, overwhelmed, and I got overstimulated sometimes. That was also the reason I have been doing nothing and just doomscrolled through my phone. I know and realize that was an unhealthy thing these days. That also makes the way I read book became more slower than when I was in junior high school and high school.
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It was not just about the news in this country. But also, the things that I love got so many hates through all the timeline on social media. I do not understand why people love to hate. How can people hate someone that they did not even know existed and was alive? Also, why do people hate someone that live their life freely and just being themselves, whatever they choose to? Last, I don’t understand why people hate when there are some people being in love differently. Whether it’s with the same gender or not. Mind you, I am an ally, and yes, I am straight.
Again, that hatred during this situation is propaganda for the government. I will not be falling for it. Because it was too obvious and massive.
I will always try to think, “What is wrong with this massive topic? What are they trying to hide? What corruption or bad things did they do and need to hide?”
Trust me, throwing those hates are useless. People will continue to live their lives no matter how they do. Sometimes we need this I Don’t Give a Fuck mindset.
Like, for real. Don’t try to make people feel like they are Serba Salah of the Year. When they just try to live this life by being themselves, to do something they love, and love someone that they love.
Honestly, I don’t think I could understand humans 100%. Because sometimes I don’t even understand myself. You won’t understand why people chose A-Z. You just know they chose that and didn’t know how they did that or the reason behind their choices.
