Scheduled or Spontaneous ?
#Parents Version
Stepping away from home is not just difficult for the bird leaving the nest, but also for the old birds who nurtured her all these years. When you enter a new, unprotected world, you don’t quite know what lies ahead, but your parents, in their own way, have walked similar paths before. They try to guide you, support you, and stay connected in whatever ways they can.
Regular check-ins become a part of that connection. Because the truth is, one can never fully let go of their children, regardless of age or distance. Video calls, text messages — these are not mere routines, but quiet expressions of love and concern.
Yet, an interesting question lingers: Should these calls be scheduled or spontaneous?
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A scheduled call brings structure, it ensures both sides are available, present, and undistracted. But a spontaneous call carries a certain warmth, a sense of freedom and immediacy. It feels more alive, more real.
And yet, what happens when routines take over? When time zones interfere? When spontaneity clashes with someone else’s life rhythm? Do scheduled calls then begin to feel like formal check-ins and almost like meetings?
Which path should one choose?
I found myself thinking about this one morning. It was early for me in the US, and Saturday evening for my parents in India. I called them, earlier than my usual time hoping to surprise them. But they were out, busy, living their own lives.
And in that moment, a quiet question arose:
Should I blame them for not being available? Or was it simply my mistake, to expect spontaneity to align with their time?
Perhaps the answer lies somewhere in between; in learning that love doesn’t always respond on cue, and connection, much like life, finds its own imperfect timing.
