Something left behind
but always find its way back
Morning. Sun shines. Wind breezes. And your smell still linger.
It has been more than 100 days since the day we decided to bid good bye to each other. It was never difficult for us; we did not even have a string to cling to in the first place, so why would it be hard to cut it? You, with that dumb bright smile, squinted brown eyes, head-to-toe black attire of yours, waved your hand and left, facing your back to my tears.
How did we end up in this… condition? Let’s just say that I was smart enough not to trust the crap of love. Why would we spend our precious time with the cringe affection, if we could step up our destiny to success instead? But that thought flew right away as I laid on my bed, wanting to be pampered and cuddled. While you — let’s just say that you never believed in so-called romantic sweetness in your life, but boy were you lonely and needed someone to lean to.
Commitment was always the issue here, so we agreed to tangle our hands with mutual benefits, but no love involved.
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Funny how you left it out, yet somehow it crawled its way to your heart.
I started seeing you with hearts in my eyes when you picked me up after a chaotic day at work. I started serving you affection when you said you needed help with choosing a suit for your meeting. I started smiling like some moron when you remembered my favorite place to go when I needed to clear my mind. It happened so fast, I almost fell into that hole I have sworn never pay any visit.
“I think we should end this,” that, I said with confident, hoping you could understand.
But you, with that wickedly charming grin only replied, “What did we even start?”
So, that’s how I lost something that was not even mine.
At first it was a piece of cake; no more phone calls in the middle of work, no more pictures spam of cats and cups of coffee, no more “where-are-you-I’m-outside-please-open-the-door” shouts, and boy was I in peace. I was at the top of the pyramid, feeling the sweet juice of success that I earned thanks to my hardworking brain and muscles, leaving trails of blood, sweat and tears as I climbed my stairs.
Then came the heartbreak phase, where no heart was even touched by love yet it begged to be mended.
Ironic, I thought as I sipped your favorite beverage, in the place we used to go together, in my head-to-toe black clothes. I woke up every day, ready to tackle whatever was in front me, yet here I was, still see your piece every where my eyes landed to.
