(THE SUBTITLE WASN’T WORKING SO I’LL PUT IT HERE: AFTER SWALLOWING A STRANGE GREEN PILL FROM A STRANGER, JAY COOPER WAKES IN A FRACTURED VERSION OF REALITY WITH NO MEMORY OF WHO HE WAS OR WHY HE ERASED HIMSELF. WITH ONLY A CRYPTIC COMPANION TO GUIDE HIM, JAY MUST NAVIGATE SURREAL LANDSCAPES, PIECE TOGETHER HIS PAST, AND FACE THE TRUTH BEHIND HIS OWN UNDOING.)
The start
I woke up early this morning, partly because I had been twisting and turning all night. The nightmares don’t typically keep me from falling asleep, but a particular bottle of melatonin did.
I rolled out of bed, letting myself lie on the dirty wood floor for just a moment. Oddly, it felt comforting. Then I stood up, my bare feet padding on the floor, causing the bottom of my feet to collect dust and whatever lies on the floor. I don’t take a moment to examine or fix the state of my unkempt room before stepping into the bathroom to relieve myself. I walk purposefully over the tiled floor to the sink, staring at what seemed to be — what I wanted to believe was a warped re-telling of my face.
The mirror didn’t even spare me a half-ass apology, almost as if it purposely displayed my most prominent features that made my face look charmless. An Adam’s apple that would stick out too far, and eyes too far apart. I went back into my bedroom, in search of my work uniform — only to remember I had been fired last month from the call center, for poor performance. They say time flies when you’re having fun — I can confidently say I don’t remember a single moment of my job, well before I lost it that is. My apartment looked like a festival of bulls had run through, and I didn’t bother to clean up after their party. I turned my head down to look at my watch, but I was dumbfounded to realize I wasn’t wearing my watch. I’d forgotten I gave it away to my neighbor — I gave away copious amounts of my possessions, to express a final act of kindness before I go.
I made my way into the heart of my apartment, the open-plan offered a way from the kitchen and back to the couch where I could create mindless theories of my existence, a cycle I’d do until I fell asleep. I spent today pondering, ranging from a span of what I did do, to what I could’ve done.
I spent all day there today, that is until I went out for air, thinking maybe it would clear my head — but I know I’m too far gone. I stood out on the side of my apartment, leaning back against the brick, the harsh texture feeling like needles even through my hoodie and jeans. Maybe my body is just sensitive from lying in bed for overlong periods which caused bed sores to develop on my skin. I turned to head back inside after a particularly sharp Buffalo gust of wind slapped me like it had a vengeance for me.
That’s when I saw him. Just standing there.
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An imposing figure with the looks of a necromancer, a unique misshapen face he wore that forced my eyes to bore into his. A face that would make even the kindest, think twice before offering a polite smile. The man wore a lab coat, leading me to assume he was some sort of “street pharmacist” about to offer me a quick fix of Percocet. I looked down at the concrete, trying to pretend I didn’t notice him.
“I’ve been where you are, right now” He spoke, his voice deep, his crazed eyes betraying his mundane tone.
“Look man, I think it’s best you get lost alright? I’m not buying what you’re selling-” I started in a frustrated tone, shutting my eyes shut tiredly as my fist clenched uncharacteristically at my sides. I didn’t know how to fight — and I wasn’t going to start now.
“My name is Dr. Hirsch and. I’m not selling anything. I’m giving this out for free.” Dr. Hirsch broke his silence, giving me a sharp look that almost seemed like a warning, as he pulled an oval-shaped bright green pill from his coat pocket.
“What do you have to lose?” The man, Dr. Hirsch started with a small sickening smile as he cautiously held out the pill in the palm of his hand, It was like he had looked right through me. Almost as if he, always knew me.
I swallowed knowing he was right, I didn’t have anything to lose. But could I gain from trusting a man I only knew for a second? I reached out and took the pill from him, before quickly walking off backwards and as I did he gave me a toothy smile. Exposing a museum of yellow, chips, and cracks.
When I had gotten back into my apartment I slumped over to my bed. I stared at the pill in my hand. It was so green it looked radioactive. Maybe that was the whole point. I couldn’t remember the last time anything in my life had color.
I swallowed the pill.
Completely dry.
