Why Community?
Humans need dialogue. In our communities we find it.
In 1977, a woman stood up to ask Professor Marshall Mcluhan a question in the lobby of the Sydney Marriott. She wanted to know: as weapons of war become increasingly more powerful, what can we do to stop the progress of violence?
The interaction that followed struck me for a few reasons. (I really encourage you to check the full exchange out in the video below.)
“Violence is the quest for identity.” — Marshall Mcluhan
First, the woman who asked the question. I identify with her, and maybe you do too. She’s thoughtful, goodhearted and earnestly concerned about the state of the world. This woman was worried about the exact same things in 1977 that we are today. As my friend Greg said, “for all of our talk of progress and high-speed change, you wonder how much actually changes deep down for humans.” True dat!
In violence, we seek our own identity through coercion of others.
In his response to her, Mcluhan defines “violence” as a term that encompasses all the ways we abrasively “bump into other people in order to find out ‘Who am I?’” We force others into giving us something so that we might gain more certainty in ourselves.
That got me thinking of an unexpected parallel. I understand communities to serve a somewhat similar function to how Mcluhan understands violence: both are vehicles for etching out our own identities.
“A strong community helps people develop a sense of true self, for only in community can the self exercise and fulfill its nature: giving and taking, listening and speaking, being and doing.” — Parker J. Palmer
In our research on communities at People & Company, one of the most surprising things we keep hearing is that people feel they deepen their individuality through the groups they join instead of lose it. We choose to be around people that share our interests, values, and parts of our own identity in part to explore and underscore those things for ourselves.
But where violence is an abrasive, one-sided act, a community is a space for people to explore their individuality with others. A healthy community is like a dance floor. When dancing, you become more of yourself as you become one with others. The exuberant energy that results is where we create collective hope.
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How do communities do that? What distinguishes them from other forms of human interaction like violence?
The functional unit of any community is dialogue.
In our communities, we seek out our own identity through rich, repeat dialogue with others. Beyoncé fans stoke their excitement when they revel together in her glory at concerts or find each other Twitter. Edcampers deepen their love for teaching through intimate in-person conversations. Bogleheads crystallize their fascination with finance on forums. And I reaffirm my enchantment with Mola Mola when I DM fellow appreciators on Instagram.
“The alternative to violence is dialogue, which is a kind of encounter interface with other people and situations.”
—Marshall Mcluhan
These dialogues are what you should design for if you want to help a community grow, evolve, or go deeper. No matter the scale or format of your community, the goal remains the same: more, better dialogues.
This is urgent work. As technology rapidly changes how we interact, our understanding of dialogue has to keep pace. The first step is to challenge ourselves to think of dialogue as something more than it’s simplest definition. Dialogue could come in-person or online. It can be spoken or unspoken (musical, visual, physical). This vision of dialogue we should design for is a grander principle, composed of three fundamental elements:
- Participation. A dialogue has at least two parties involved, but may include more. Think table tennis, not golf. 🏓
- Shared ownership: Crucially, dialogues are also a willful exchange. Everyone chooses to participate and feels they are essential to what the shared experience will become. Think potluck, not prix fixe. 🥘
- Serial: Our communities offer us spaces to return to for the kind of focused, nuanced, ongoing dialogues that bring ideas to greater depth, not endless breadth. Think forums, not Twitter. 🔍
Dialogues like these are where we humans come to sense that we are all integral and we are all on the same team. Without them, we can feel alone and valueless facing the world. But with them, we move into the future together.
Onward ✌️
