Case Closed?
Review of Netflix’s My Father: The BTK Killer
Let me start off by saying, if you were to read anything I have blogged about so far, let this be it. This documentary really got to me in a way I wasn’t expecting. It’s one of the best true crime docs because it actually focuses on someone directly affected by the crimes instead of obsessing over the killer himself. In this case, its Kerri Rawson, Dennis Rader’s daughter, and her story is something that stuck with me (as someone who has watched a LOT of true crime).
They do spend time talking about his crimes, his weird ideas to communicate with the news and police, and how he eventually got caught. But Kerri is really the one this documentary is about. I didn’t remember much about Rader going in besides the basics (Bind, Torture, Kill) and that he was this normal father living a double life. But watching this, I learned so many details I either forgot or never knew in the first place.
What really blew my mind was how easy it was to catch him once he made his one stupid mistake. And then there’s the part about them using Kerri’s DNA to confirm his identity. Not just any DNA either — her pap smear from when she was in college. When they mentioned that, I had to pause for a second. The violation of that was unimaginable and is just another issue on top of her father being a serial killer.
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Kerri is the only person in her family who agreed to speak publicly about this, and you can tell she’s fully aware of what that means. There’s this part where she talks about how her mother was able to divorce Rader and move away, go back to her own family and try to rebuild some kind of normal life. But Kerri? She doesn’t get that option. She can’t just walk away. She’s, his daughter. They share DNA. She even looks like him. These are issues that can never be solved, but so many feelings come with them.
I was quite surprised when she decided to visit him in prison. Based on everything she’d been saying, I really didn’t think she would go. Writing letters is one thing, but sitting across from him in a prison visiting room? Looking at his eyes and face? Now I can’t say that I would never do that as my father is not a serial killer, but the idea is insane to me.
When she finally exploded and went off on him during that visit, I wasn’t surprised at all. Especially after he tried to basically gaslight her and lie about crimes he also probably committed. When he said to her, “Can’t we just reminisce”, I knew she was going to go off. How can you expect your daughter to reminisce on her childhood when you are literally a serial killer?
Something that really stayed with me was the weight that Kerri has to carry for the rest of her life. It’s not just about being BTK’s daughter, though that alone is more than anyone should have to deal with. It’s everything that came with it and still comes with it. The media attention from news outlets and social media, the ruin of personal relationships, and her never being ablet to escape this. She didn’t just lose her father the day he was arrested. She lost her entire family. Her brother hasn’t spoken publicly, and her mother moved on separately. Kerri is out here on her own.
By the end, I just sat there thinking about everything. This isn’t your typical true crime story where they solve the case, and everyone moves on. This is about what happens after. About the people left behind trying to pick up the pieces. Kerri’s life was completely destroyed by something she had no control over, and she’s doing her best to rebuild it one day at a time.
The amount of people who live a life similar to Kerri is probably quite high. I hope that family members of victims or other killers watch this documentary and know that their feelings are valid. Overall, this is a great hour and a half of your life to spend, especially to knock you back into reality. This is also a great reminder to not just learn about the killers, but the stories of other people involved too.
