Secret Love
I fell in love with you, not because I thought you loved me back, because I believed and still believe we could make each other incredibly happy.
As with most feelings I never saw them coming. For a long time I didn’t know how or where to store them. I got angy. I got sad. I tried to turn my back on it all.
But in the end, after fighting a losing battle with myself over you, I gave up. I decided that it wasn’t wrong for me to care about you so much, because every single feeling had come from something you did that amazed me, or something you’d said that made me smile.
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A long time has passed but my feelings have’t changed. I’ve learnt how to love you and be happy without you even knowing. And if you do know, then you’ve done a great job of not letting me know.
There are times, sometimes, when I look into your eyes for a touch longer than I probably should, and I wonder if you know exactly how I feel. There are times, sometimes, when I look at the way you look back at me, and I wonder if you’re thinking exactly what I am too. That I would love to lose all fear and kiss you.
Then I remember that you’re extremely good at getting exactly what you want, and if that was me, then you would have me already.
So, I have given myself the job of trying to make you as happy as possible, as a friend. And even though I may often have thoughts of a very different relationship, never doubt that my friendship is real, I want nothing more than to see you happy, and that I love you. Very much.
