Am I ready?
By: Audio Girl
Here’s the question in my mind that I’m thinking about, am I even ready? When I go searching for the love of my life, if I even go search for the love of my life, or my first love, or the one whose supposed to be in my dreams. Am I even ready for love?
Because love, is based on this frantic worry about that person, and is the person you have to trust completely, and trust them to be loyal, but also be loyal too. Am I even ready for any of that? Am I ready, for someone who’s supposedly be the one I starve myself for, ’cause I feel fat, or I’m just too full of love to even eat a thing.
Where their face, and everything is stuck into my mind, from the time I wake up in the morning till the moment I close my eyes to sleep. I mean freak that! Because they’re still stuck in my dreams too. Am I ready? To not ask them why they love me, because they would already be mentioning all the things, and details they noticed about me before I even notice it about my own self.
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Am I ready, for that other person, or even myself, to mess up once. To know they’re heartbroken, or pissed off. And when the tables are turned, its all on you, where you’re pretty damn heartbroken. You blame everything on the other person, you blame yourself for trusting, or loving them.
Am I ready, to be in a committed relationship, to deal with a pretty weird relationship. Am I ready, to get my heartbroken a million times over. To keep forgiving, forgiving and forgiving them because I love them! Am I ready, to let them go when I have to.
I mean, what would I do, if their parents don’t like me? Am I ready for that? Am I ready, to get all these things straight. What if its another unrequited love? Again where they go for my best friend. And again, where I have to step aside from my crush on the person they both like, to watch them, let them! Be in their freaking relationship!
Am I ready for love?
Am I ready, for the many rejections that come on the way? Am I ready, for someone, to love me, and care for me, protect me, and do all those lovey gooey stuff? Am I ready for the fights that come along? Countless bickering? Am I ready to not feel insecure around them?
Because all people seem to think, or see, including I, they seem to see it at the good parts. But I don’t think they’re just as ready as I am. Though they found their first love already. I don’t think I’m ready yet.
