Home?
Keisha Kirana Chadiaputri — INA AFS to Italy YP 25/26
Home. What is a home? Is it just some place where you live? Or could it be a person? Maybe it’s neither. Well, at least for me, home is where the heart is.
I was never the kind of person to get homesick. Never the child they worry about. Always the eldest daughter they know can take care of herself. But somehow, this Eid made me realize something inside me that I didn’t even know I could feel. Spending Eid al-Fitr alone, without any other Muslims near me, opened my eyes. The bickering early morning on the first day of Eid that I once dreaded is now something I miss dearly.
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Home really is where the heart is. 11,000 kilometers away, they still check up on me as much as they can. You don’t necessarily have to be with each other to still feel loved and to give love to your loved ones. And I do believe that love is really all around, sometimes you don’t even have to search for it. I feel so seen and loved by the people I’ve met here. My centro locale is super active in making sure I don’t feel alone during this period. Having classmates and a host family who are understanding.
Most importantly, this Ramadan and Eid taught me to be more grateful for what I have, not only the people around me, but also how to love myself for who I am. I may not be perfect, but that’s alright. I still have things and people to miss, because it means that I’ve lived a life where they are worth missing. It may not be the celebration I’m used to, but I’m still celebrating, just in a different way. It made me appreciate everything more and not take anything for granted, as we never know when it’ll be gone.
People might say, as they leave their exchange year, “I’m leaving home to go home,” but for me that’s not true. The first home never actually left, and neither will this one. Both I’ll always carry alongside me as one, in my heart forever.
Something I would call my forever home.
