Positivity (Pt 2)
As I re-read my prior post, Positivity, I feel that I am beginning to better understand my formula for happiness. This concept may be universal to those with BP2, but may need to be adjusted based on what you struggle with as an individual, how you treat your condition, how you organize your thoughts and feelings, and so on.
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My formula: BE POSITIVE * BE FOCUSED = HAPPINESS
It is easy to read self-help, daily blogs about attitude, habits of happy people, and gaining perspective. By perspective, I mean often quoted studies like once you make more than $70k per year it doesn’t lead to greater happiness, or happy couples make love twice per week, etc. But when you read these articles, I am not sure that will resonate with someone who has negative thoughts, battles depression / suicidality, self-inflicts pain and loathing. It may be easier to get to a point of happiness simply for others. For the rest of us, it is about the journey, about the path, and about the process to reach happiness, we can’t simply say we want to get there and it happens magically like a helicopter, skipping over the tough terrain.
For me, I need to often flip my negative thoughts into positive ones, write gratitudes and affirmations, talk to family and friends. This is all classic cognitive behavioral therapy exercises. But first, I need to manage my thoughts to be optimistic, the world loves me, I can be successful and happy, if I work hard and have integrity. I still say that positivity is the foundation, but what supports that foundation is staying FOCUSED. It is very easy to not do small habits that create change. It is easy to relax on therapy, medication, not getting outside every day, to not hold yourself accountable for your mental state. So you must remain focused and consistent to build upon your positive thoughts. And when you do these two things, happiness is the product. You need to take the first two items, and really multiply them by each other — if you have a positive thought, but it is not directed and used on something you need to focus on, it is like multiplying by zero, you get nothing for it, rather than the expected result of happiness.
