FOURTH EDITION
The Letter — Kehlani
I first discovered Kehlani’s music back in 2017 with her breakthrough track “Honey” and then in 2018 with “Again”. Since then, I’ve loved her music. While my favorite album of hers is undoubtedly “Blue Water Road”, today I want to delve into a lesser-known gem from her repertoire: “The Letter” from the album “You Should Be Here” (which happens to be one of my favorites too).
Kehlani, born on April 24th, 1995, is an American singer and songwriter known for blending R&B, pop, hip-hop, and neo-soul into her distinctive style. My initial impression of her music was deep and resonant, capturing emotions and experiences with raw honesty.
I selected “The Letter” because it’s a track that often flies under the radar in her discography. It’s a poignant and melancholic piece that immediately drew me in. Listening closely to the lyrics, I discovered a side of Kehlani that I hadn’t fully seen before. While I’ve always enjoyed her music, this song prompted me to explore her work on a deeper level.
As far as I can tell, “The Letter” touches on the theme of an absent mother or a significant figure who was missing from her life. It’s a powerful exploration of loss and longing, set against a backdrop that feels deeply personal and reflective.
With Kehlani’s recent release of the album “CRASH”, I’m considering doing a deep dive into those tracks next. Her ability to evolve while staying true to her roots continues to impress me.
Let’s break it down
“I can hear your laugh, It’s ringing through the hallways”
Immediately drawing listeners into a reflection on a cherished figure from her past. Through soulful reminiscence, she captures the enduring impact of this unnamed individual, whose laughter remains a cherished memory.
“I can see your smile ; It’s what gets me through my hard days”
This line aims to evoke sensory experiences that aid the listener’s comprehension (sight, hearing). It illustrates how someone’s smile provides strength and comfort in challenging moments.
“And your words ; Were supposed to get me through my heartache , Before my heartbreak”
Kehlani is most likely referring to a maternal figure or someone closely related, given her intention to alleviate heartaches — a role typically fulfilled by parents towards their children. This implies a reliance on emotional guidance and hints at her discussing an absent mother.
“There’s an emptiness ; That only few ever feel”
the absence of a mother; it’s a feeling that only a few can understand or relate to — a unique and singular emotion.
“And I somehow missed ; The meaning of love that is real”
A mother’s love is the most genuine form of love, known for its unconditional nature. It implies a sense of regret or confusion about not fully comprehending the depth of maternal love.
“And it complements ; My scars that will never heal”
The absence of a mother deepens emotional wounds that feel impossible to heal.
“Maybe I didn’t deserve you ; Maybe I just couldn’t cure you”
She struggles with guilt and feeling not good enough, questioning if she didn’t deserve her mother’s love or couldn’t protect her from something.
“They told me that I didn’t hurt you ; Why do I feel like I turned you?”
“Maybe I don’t understand it ; Tell me, is this how you planned it?”
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After researching, I discovered that Kehlani’s mother was in jail because of her drug addiction, which explains her absence. Despite reassurances from others, Kehlani feels guilty for her mother’s absence, believing she may have pushed her away or caused her pain.
“Did you see us, so stranded? ; Maybe I’m too much to manage”
Questions about her mother’s intentions and choices, she is seeking clarity and closure.
“And if you weren’t gonna guide me ; Why bring me into the light?”
The anguish of navigating life without the guidance or support of one’s mother weighs heavily.
“Must have done something ; To make you want to run and hide”
Believes that she must have done something wrong to make her mother withdraw or leave.
“Why, oh why ; Didn’t you just live your life? Uh”
She expresses feelings of confusion and sadness about her mother’s absence from her life, questioning why her mother didn’t choose to be there with her.
“And every girl needs a mother ; And, damn it, I needed you”
Highlights the universal need for maternal guidance and support, emphasizing her own deep longing and need for her mother.
“Instead, you dug for cover ; And you ran from the truth”
Implies that her mother avoided facing reality or responsibility, possibly choosing to escape from difficult circumstances rather than confronting them.
“And like kids do ; We waited around for proof”
Suggests that, like children waiting for validation or confirmation, Kehlani and possibly siblings or family members waited for some form of acknowledgment or resolution from their absent mother.
“Maybe I didn’t deserve you ; Maybe I just couldn’t cure you”
“They told me that I didn’t hurt you ; Why do I feel like I turned you?”
“And maybe I don’t understand it; Tell me, is this how you planned it?”
“Do you see us, so stranded?” ; “Maybe I’m too much to manage”
“Maybe I didn’t deserve you”
She continues to struggle with self-doubt and guilt, questioning her own worthiness of her mother’s love and presence. There is a deep yearning for answers and closure regarding her mother’s absence and intentions. Kehlani feels abandoned.
These lyrics vividly portray sorrow and a search for comprehension after a mother’s absence. She wrestles with mixed feelings — guilt, longing, and the hurt of feeling left behind. Repeatedly questioning what could have been done differently highlights a profound sense of grief and unresolved emotions.
Ultimately, the song resonates with the universal struggle of navigating parental bonds and the lasting influence of maternal love and absence.
This song is important because it explores a feeling that can often be isolating and unique. Despite its poignant and melancholic tone, I believe there are many listeners who can relate to the emotions expressed. The song has the power to bring comfort and reassurance to those going through similar experiences, reminding them that they are not alone in their feelings of loss and longing.
What strikes me the most is the artist’s bravery and vulnerability in sharing such personal sentiments with her audience. By openly addressing the complexities of maternal absence and emotional struggle, she not only validates her own experience but also creates a space for listeners to connect and find solace in their shared humanity. This level of honesty and authenticity is both powerful and commendable, as it encourages empathy and understanding among listeners who may be grappling with similar feelings.
