Name i don’t mind hearing
isn’t it funny? i don’t think i ever really liked people calling me by my name in a conversation until you did.
if anyone else did, i felt like i was being scolded, or they were just being sarcastic because of some kind of nonsensical bullshit that came out of my mouth.
but really, even tho u’re being annoyed, even with your eyes rolling, your face irritated when u call my name after some bullshit, i would love to hear u calling my name like that again and again, a thousand times or even more.
i like how that sounds. with your tone, with your voice, with u. cuz,
suddenly i just want to annoy u even more just to hear that again.
suddenly my guard falls off when u call me like that.
suddenly i want to tell u every single thing when my heart is full of doubt, just because u’re calling me like that.
if i was mad, suddenly i just want to break down and cry in your arms when my day feels heavy, just because u’re calling me like that.
u do it like i would disappear if u were too loud.
u do it like i would shatter into pieces if u weren’t as soft as u could be when u call my name.
it’s funny, cuz i normally don’t like it when people do that.
i feel like i’m being exposed, cuz my mind starts whirling with:
Get calicious’s stories in your inbox
Join Medium for free to get updates from this writer.
“what did i do wrong?”
“did i make a mistake?”
“are they going to accuse me?”
cuz i’m weak to that.
it makes me soft, open, and vulnerable.
i’m scared that i’m being too open with them.
i’m scared to say what’s filling my head and burden my heart.
i’m scared of what they’ll do if somehow i get carried away thinking that they’re actually ready and willing to open their hands, their head, and their heart when they actually aren’t.
but i feel safe with u.
i didn’t even think twice when u were the one who did it. somehow, i didn’t even feel, not even once, like i had to doubt that u love to hear me, that u love me too.
turns out, i really love it when u call me by my name like it’s something sacred, casually. so casually.
it feels like an invitation to lean on u, to be vulnerable with u, to be clingy, and to lovingly tell u everything in my heart about how much i love hearing my name come out of your mouth.
i love every single syllable, every letter that spells my name, falling apart from your mouth.
and i can’t even think of a way to make my name sound more beautiful, more comforting, more grounding if it doesn’t come from your mouth and your lips, your tone and intonation, with your voice and no one else’s.
so please.. call me forever
