She
She is a 26-year-old girl trying to understand the world she lives in — a world she never imagined could be this difficult.
She carries very few memories of her childhood. Sometimes, it feels as though half of her life never happened at all. For years, short-term memory has been her companion, perhaps because her mind has been doing everything it can to protect her.
It helps her forget the pain, soften the weight of difficult moments, and keep her eyes on the future instead of the past. Deep down, she knows her mind is only trying to help her survive — to help her find joy in life, heal from what hurt her, and continue building the future she longs for.
And so, she keeps going. One day at a time.
At some point, she realized that she was never weak. It is hard to explain the pain she has carried for so long. It is hard to explain the loneliness she feels, even when surrounded by people. Deep down, she knows she has spent much of her life fighting harder than most, just to make people stay by her side.
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She often feels that she has nothing to be proud of. So every day, she works harder and harder, hoping to prove that having her in someone’s life can make things a little easier.
She gives so much of herself to others because she knows what it feels like to be helpless. She stays beside her friends because she knows what it feels like to be alone.
She remains with people even when they show their flaws and bad habits because she knows what it feels like to have someone stay when things get difficult. She knows how much it means when someone chooses to stay — not only during the good times, but also after they have seen the worst parts of you and decide that you are still worth loving.
Perhaps that is why she loves so deeply.
Not because she was taught how to be loved, but because she spent so much of her life longing for a love she could never quite reach.
And yet, she still believes in it.
She still believes that one day, someone will stay — not because she fought for them to stay, but because they simply choose to.
