The Soft Life I Cannot Afford

Truth be told, I was sobbing when I posted this on Substack last November and just needed to write. Usually you get these unedited poems months later once I have finished processing them, this one was getting hot off the press.

I want a garden and quiet mornings

to sleep until the ache dissolves

I want to wake up and feel

like I have done enough

and tea that doesn’t taste like the guilt

of taking a break

The weight of the world

and what it costs manifests

physically

in my skin missing around my nail beds

and the dark circles hanging under my eyes

and I am tired of turning my body

into proof that I’m trying

there is a small part of me

still building a home

from poems and stubbornness

I am trying to convince myself

to believe that one day

I’ll live in the quiet I’ve earned

and not just write about it.

I’m Devyn — a Precision Medicine Masters student from Canada, a survivor, an artist, and a storyteller. If these words meant something to you and you’d like to help me keep writing (and chip away at tuition), you can support me with a donation or buy me a…