The One When It’s My Birthday.
How did the years fly?
It’s my birthday again, and honestly, I am still trying to wrap my head around how fast time seems to move these days.
I keep thinking back to when I was sixteen, lying awake at night, daydreaming about what my future would look like. Back then, the future felt so big and shiny, like a movie I would be starring in.
Everyone kept saying,
Chase the dream. Make it happen.
So I did. Or at least, I tried.
It has taken a lot of grit and drive to keep going. And truthfully, I have faced my fair share of failures, the kind that make you question everything, even your own reflection in the mirror. But somehow, even when I felt completely knocked down, I kept showing up.
I have learnt that consistency is mosttimes the only thing you have got when certainty goes missing. Always always show up.
One thing I have noticed as I have gotten older is how easy it is to find reasons not to do what you know you should do, especially when life gets hard. Comfort is tempting. Fear loves to whisper excuses. And the weight of not knowing what’s next can be heavier than failing outright.
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Hope, though… Hope is such a complicated thing.
On the one hand, hope is beautiful. It is what keeps your spirit alive. It is that tiny spark inside you that insists something good is still possible, even if you can’t see it yet.
But on the other hand, hope can be terrifying. Because the hardest part is not knowing when it is all going to happen or if it will look anything like you imagined. The waiting is what tests you most. Hope is hard.
Dulcé Lazaria Sloan explains hope best:
Somewhere along the way, I started to realise that “success” as I used to know it isn’t this one big thing waiting for me in the future when I want to come but eventually it will come.
I am learning that success is about defining life on my own terms.
I want to reach my full self-actualisation, to be the best version of myself, but also to like and love myself even on the days when I am not my best. I want to listen to my own voice and trust it, instead of drowning in everyone else’s opinions.
And through all these years, some things haven’t changed: I still love life, art, science, technology, and everything that makes the world good, even the chaos.
They remind me there is more than one way to see the world.
So here I am, another year older, still learning, still hoping, still figuring it all out.
I believe success will come. I just want to make sure I’m the one who decides what it means for me.
