Where do I go from here?
English was my favorite subject growing up. I always had the best teachers who were interested in seeing my growth and appreciated my excitement to show up every day.
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Today I decided on my third adderall of the day that I needed to move from my 750words.com subscription, to another literally platform that might give me that accountability to release my frustrations and doom onto a page. I started to overthink after seeing an old friend today, I felt like I overshared when I was excited reunite, I felt like I poorly executed explaining my feelings at the cost of being grandiose or poetic. Then I got down a near schizophrenic episode of noticing the 50 flies disappear after she left when they had just beeing buzzing. Or its probably just its summer and my college styled home stinks.
I guess what I’m really getting at is I love to have good dialogue, but I’m at a point in my life where I’m so invested in becoming a listener in my relationships. I’m selfish enough to say and honest enough to admit: I want to hear my stories, perspectives, ideas shared with a public audience. But I don’t want the attention or visible digital footprint? I’m a victim of being another anxious young adult, now having to face ?’s like: “am i shy”, “Am I as outwardly expressive about what I believe in at all times?”
-Ciao-
