Fandom Pain
Heart-shaped decorations alleviated amorous atmospheres here and there. All things red and pink dominated malls, minimarkets, and even mansions. Confectioneries and bakeries were offering chocolates or brownies designed in similar styles and shades. Timely tunes that retold enchanting encounters or intimate interchanges suddenly felt sweeter than ever. Events and gifts, such as candlelight dinners and bouquets of roses, were must-do and must-buy items.
What on earth was happening? Well, those lovey-dovey details meant the world has fully rotated into the one date that people either look forward to or loathe (maybe even both at the same time?). Valentine’s Day is here! Or, as a punctual nitpicker would say, it has come and gone.
It felt like only yesterday that I did a ramble about this arguably commercialized festivity. But once the accumulated tiredness of 2025 sank in, reality hit. It was still fresh in my mind alone.️ Time just passed by so fast. Too fast, even!
An instant follow-up thought then occurred: Why the need to discuss Valentine’s Day again when that old post could lazily be reposted? But its core theme is love, after all. And love, whether we like it or not, is here, all around us, both in plain sight and through subtle gestures. From the angelic Agape to the evocative Eros, love always invites old stories and new discussions. By discussion, it literally meant a 30-minute talk show compilation that would lull anyone to sleep on Valentine’s Eve. Assuming that’s even an actual term.
So, without further ado, let’s do that, too! But this time, and this year specifically, let’s talk about a unique kind of passionate love that can range from adorable to extreme. It’s a shared feeling of appreciation and affection that may be as uplifting as it is intoxicating.
To be a FAN!!!
L is for the Way You Look
Everyone’s a fan of something. As human beings, we have the agency to like someone or something. When that feeling of fascination grows stronger, it transforms into admiration.
Over time, such intense fondness may accumulate into devotion, and eventually sheer adoration. Many even go so far as to defy logic and explanations. We’ve all seen how groups of people are willing to believe or do pretty much anything their worshipped leader/figure claims and orders them to. Isn’t that how religions were born? Or how political parties gain traction?
This isn’t THAT kind of essay, of course. So, there’ll be no further exploration about those. But being a fan, and not just a casual fan, in many ways is similar all along, eh? It’s a community that doesn’t mind paying extra or invests more time and energy in a subject/object of interest.
In older, more sensible, more understanding days, that is. More on that in a few…
“The fans are like rings that orbit round and round around the stars. They’re all just countless particles.
This is how far I should be from him. I can’t make the mistake of becoming a meteor and crash into him.”
— Utage Kinoshita, Tamon-kun Ima Docchi!? (Episode 1)
The quote I included above came from a surprising new anime that’s currently airing, titled Tamon-kun Ima Docchi!? (Tamon-kun’s B-Side). Surprising because it was never on my radar, as idols and everything around them are NOT a personal favorite. I tried to get into it when I was much younger, influenced by peer pressure and all. Even so, looking back, the primary interest was always for their songs, not the whole concept of idols and the daunting devotion towards them.
Okay, that’s a pretty elaborate exposition to say, “I’ve never been much of a fan,” huh?
Anyway, Tamon-kun is a rom-com that leans more into comedy. That’s the reason I, a FAN of good comedies, ended up watching it. A fair dose of laughter is always helpful, if not necessary, to lighten up the heavy, dreary, and needy nature of our daily demands. It’s the cheesy or sweet embrace we need!
Much like my delightful introduction to a certain gourmet anime last year, Tamon-kun most definitely made the most timely entrance. I settled on the topic of fans’ love late last year. The anime, however, has given deeper insight and understanding into how devoted a fan can be. Its theme just clicked so soundly! Like a fated pairing, if it’s meant to be, it’s JUST meant to be.
The manga-turned-anime series centers on Utage Kinoshita, a high school student who works part-time as a housekeeper. Her job has a divine purpose. Utage needs money to support something, or SOMEONE, to be precise. That someone is none other than her Oshikatsu, the titular Tamon Fukuhara, the alluring, sexy, seductive member of the idol unit (or as we in the 90s called it, boyband) F/ACE. More than that, the hardworking girl is a self-proclaimed missionary of the Church of Tamon, vowing to spread the good word of Tamon and attract more followers.
Hilariously, the same job crashed Utage into a mindblowing reality check. Tamon’s pretty guy, people-pleasing, publicized persona is, well, merely a persona. A gigantic facade, to put it bluntly. His real personality is the complete opposite. Hence, the title’s direct translation, “Which Tamon Am I Seeing Now!?” comes into clearer perspective. As implied by his true nature, Tamon is only the first example in the series.
Utage’s expressive, but endearing reactions, actions, and interactions with Tamon’s gloomy antics fuel nonstop laughter. Yet, despite the strange and wacky situations, she also portrays the spirit of a sincerely supportive fan. It’s clear that Utage, so far, is a conscious attempt to depict the more positive part of the fandom.
O is for the Only One
FANDOM is the community of fans sharing the same interest, as simple as that. It’s an old term coined more than a century ago. The base word is, obviously enough, FAN, which itself appeared two to three decades earlier. A deeper look points out that the term originated from two possible words: Fancy and Fanatic. Each one also has its own semantic history.️
At the time, a “fan” refers to a sports enthusiast. Baseball fancy fanatics, in that era. Nevertheless, as we’re now aware, the scope has expanded to encompass nearly any cultural phenomenon, including TV shows, movies, and public figures. The nature is, to put it in a love lingo, polyamory, considering someone can be an ultra fan of several fandoms at the same time.
Oshikatsu, closely compared to the Western idea of Stan Culture, is a subculture of fandom. This particular subculture carries very different connotations depending on who’s looking. To outsiders, their dedication may seem like an addiction that involves unnecessary spending. Still, economists believe it has the potential to revitalize Japan’s economy as well.
That describes Utage’s character and driving force. As a student, she doesn’t really need to worry about food on the table or paying monthly electrical bills. She has parents who are alive and active to handle those responsibilities. Oshikatsu activities, on the other hand, are NOT cheap. It requires significant financial demands on Utage’s pocket to show support for her Oshi. There are concerts to attend, merchandise to buy, and all kinds of fans’ trinkets to make! For that reason, she works hard to make all of that possible.
Admittedly, the negative sentiment that fawning over an oshi is pointless, negative, unhealthy, and selfish makes sense. But instead of judging others so easily, let’s remember that people live differently, that whatever they’re doing is their free will, and that’s fine. A lifestyle or life choice that works for one person doesn’t necessarily bode well for others.
To reiterate, everyone’s a fan of something. And if we stop to think about it, each of us has probably contributed a significant asset to our fandom. Maybe it’s literal money, like the official goods Utage collected. Or, it’s simply the intangibles, such as time, effort, and attention, just like Utage, who uses her Summer break to garner income for her hobby. Again, fandom is an overarching term that applies to a variety of subjects.
Later in the story, it was revealed that Utage also had a fundamental reason for joining Tamon’s fandom. Without spoiling anything, the idol’s presence helped her find her place and purpose. That’s the part I can relate to so much. As a human being with likes and preferences, I obviously have my share of fandom, too. My past essays are evident enough already to what they are.
The one that mirrored Utage’s dedication the most, however, was my interest in the Sakura Taisen (Sakura Wars) franchise. Their music, to be even more specific. Each song was composed by the renowned Kouhei Tanaka-sensei, who’s also famous for his work in One Piece. I can’t claim to be a hardcore fan of the entire Sakura Taisen franchise. Frankly, I had played only a few games from its library. That said, the musical numbers always gave me a purpose, whether big or small, to keep going forward.
And yes, that entire paragraph was in the past tense for a reason. Before SEGA soft-rebooted the franchise in 2019 — only to tank it again on June 30, 2021, with the underperforming Sakura Kakumei ~Hana Saku Otome-tachi~ mobile spin-off-, the game series had already entered hiatus in 2008. Even so, stage musicals and smaller-scale festivals and anniversary events continued taking place at irregular intervals until July last year, with Sakura Taisen Budoukan Live 2 ~Teito.Paris.New York~ being the most notable and memorable one, in October 2011. 💃🏻🎤
That show is worth mentioning because it was the last time the main and key supporting cast members from the first five games held a memorable, once-in-a-lifetime concert, to unsurprisingly much fanfare. Now, that glorious ensemble is no longer possible. Several of the voice actors are sadly no longer with us. Besides, my focus on the franchise has started to wind down from that point onward. Not even the 2019 game managed to revive my interest to its previous heights.
V is Very, Very Extraordinary
Such is the unfortunate, heartbreaking reality of fandom. As with all things human-related, every entertainment entity starts and finishes. It’s always a temporal existence. There’s an inevitable time limit to how long it can keep going.
Many often wish for a show or a movie franchise to continue forever. Or for their favorite idol to keep singing and shining on stage. Alas, that is as rare as a snow leopard. The kids’ show Doraemon has been on air since its 1973 premiere, even after the creator passed away. Neighbours, the famous Australian soap opera, on the other hand? It wrapped again, for the second time, last year, despite staying on screen for 41 seasons. While the legendary actor Dick Van Dyke remains as spry and enthusiastic about working, the likes of Dame Judy Dench have officially retired from the industry.
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On the bright side, the attachment itself, especially supercharged with nostalgia, doesn’t really go away. As melancholic as it may be not to see beloved titles or characters in the spotlight, technology has made it easy and convenient to revisit them. Many older series and movies that were once confined to outdated formats, such as VHS or CDs, have been digitally remastered and are accessible at the palm of modern hands.
Sure, there was a sense of sadness and pain when the object of interest left. But now, that pain feels less aching. Even when they don’t technically exist anymore, the all-time classics are still around. They will remain as long as the baton continues being passed on to the next generation. I may not be the avid fan that I was before. But the fact that I can listen to and sing Sakura Taisen songs on digital music services, 30 years after its game debut, is an extraordinary example.
“Fans are terrifying creatures.
They’re ruthless beasts who engage in bloody quarrels with each other.”
— Keito Tachibana, Tamon-kun Ima Docchi!? (Episode 7)
The new, real pain, regrettably, has come from a different side of the table instead: the fandom itself.
Eras have changed, as they always do. The way fans interact with films, shows, anime, celebrities, and more has also morphed, for better or worse. Understanding and sensibility no longer play out as they did before.
It’s not quite clear when this irritating irony started. Calling it ‘new’ already feels outdated. TOXIC FANDOM, a phrase that has gotten very common, disturbingly so, has been prevalent in recent years. Or maybe the better wording should be MUCH LOUDER AND BOLDER?
As many thinkpieces have pointed out, social media blurred barriers and boundaries between interests and fandom. It paved the way for anyone in the fandom to express their views in real-time. Disappointingly, that includes bullying, harassing, and sending death threats, not just to other fans with a different point of view, but even to the creators directly.
Stranger Things concluded its story after five seasons on New Year’s Day. Immediately after, its fans stormed the internet, crying that they had been betrayed by an ending “too HAPPY” that it didn’t meet their expectations. Apparently, it would be more pleasing to them had one or more of the characters died in the final battle. Wait, what?
The Marvel Cinematic Universe is currently in an odd state of “dismissal” post the spectacular success of Avengers: Endgame. The amount of ridiculous hatred toward its movies and TV shows echoes across social media as of this writing. Here’s an unpopular opinion: NONE of them are as awful or as bad as the discourse complaints, though. It’s just a matter of which demographics the title is aimed at.
Likewise, the same can be said about Nintendo. When the formerly beloved Japanese company announced Nintendo Switch 2, the community’s cheers quickly turned to sneers as the much higher price came to light. For years, the fandom rallied Nintendo to keep up with the rest of the gaming industry in terms of technical specs. Yet when they decided to do so, including the inevitable higher, non-family-friendly pricing? To this day, comments shouting, “Nintendo is greedy!” still appear across channels and social media posts.
“You are part of the problem” is a direct personal attack that I will never forget that day. Guess what? That was only for a neutral, harmless comment that pointed out how, due to the rising cost of everything, the “console price makes sense.” For the first time in my life, I got called a “Bootlicker” too! That felt like an Achievement Unlocked, huh?
Similarly, the Pokémon franchise continues to get the short end of the stick. Its newer games are ridiculed and review-bombed by people before they launch. The sentiment that “Game Freak is lazy” has gotten very exhausting and repetitive. It’s as if the complainers are parroting the same copy-pasted excuse. Over and over again.
When a hacker stole and leaked terabytes of internal, CONFIDENTIAL data from Game Freak — a massive privacy breach for Japanese companies — a segment of fans cheered and shouted that the punishment should have been worse. The demo of the upcoming Pokémon Pokopia, set for a March 5, 2026, release, has surprised many gaming journalists in a good way. But if one scrolls to the comment sections, the nagging rant over Game-Key Cards is still unending.
Here’s the thing: I’m a simple person, even if a natural nitpicker. If I like something, I support it in the way that I can. Maybe I can save up to buy and enjoy it fully. But if it’s too expensive, I cheer for it in silence. If I don’t like something, I don’t invest my emotions or money in it and shift my focus elsewhere. There’s really no point or benefit in harassing others who seem to like it, even if there are differing tastes.️
But that’s not how it works anymore? Does having that neutral stance mean I’m not a real fan? How about the so-called fans of modern fandoms who — under the bold excuse of pushing for good change and quality — don’t hesitate to attack creators whenever things don’t play out the way they have desired? Do they count as the real fans instead?
“Your duality seems even more intense than mine.”
— Tamon Fukuhara, Tamon-kun Ima Docchi!? (Episode 1)
By looking at it through the lens of love, the toxic development starts to feel less surprising. Fandom IS a form of love after all. There is emotional investment that’s consciously poured and planted in the dedication. Once it reaches a certain level, it may evolve into an obsession. Of course, obsession can have a positive impact as a powerful force that pushes forward. But an obsession that’s unregulated and unbalanced? That can trigger harmful outcomes or even compulsive behaviors!
If a romantic relationship can turn sour and downright abusive, the same applies to fandom. Love can warp into a dangerous sense of entitlement. When fans develop a specific fan identity, anything that does not fit their idealistic mindset may be perceived as a threat. Their personal investments suddenly mean ownership over the object of interest. God complex much? Or, in a more common term, an extraordinary pain in the neck?
E is Even More Than Anyone
No doubt, being a fan is a different situation now. It requires a lot of patience to be in a fandom that has gotten hostile, draining, or fractured. Experts say pain lingers when what we love is gone. But in modern fandom, the pain swells while it’s still alive. The noise, the wars, and the endless negativity might make one question why they even bother to stay in it!
Fortunately, people are indeed aware of the rise of toxic fandom. It’s likely one of the reasons for the increasing push to limit social media access for kids in various countries. Waves of psychologists and writers have also emphasized the importance of walking away from social media. It serves as a form of activism in its own way.
Truly, that’s indeed a great gesture and action. Although it’s not easy to pull off, the thought of not having to wade through a pool of toxic fandom already gives me peace of mind. And really, we should be in charge of our emotional safety. Let the toxic be toxic while we persevere in positivity, far away.
Moreover, the reality remains that a fandom began as a united community. A group that shared a similar love for someone or something. In many ways, that’s still happening. There are many good apples despite some rotten bunches.
When a political move prompted The Walt Disney Company to dismiss director James Gunn, positive fan support allowed him to return and direct Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3. Most recently, actress Maya Imamori was unceremoniously let go from №1 Sentai Gozyuger. The fandom voiced its disapproval about the unfair treatment. Yet, there was no boycotting the show or its producers. The show continued to air, despite being in an awkward state, and the fandom watched to the end. Both examples are proof that fandom can raise a healthy voice.
Watching Tamon-kun provides a similar reassurance. Yes, unlike other daring titles, it’s very apparent that the show doesn’t dwell too much on the unhinged side of fandom. It only threads that sensitive issue carefully. Utage herself has indeed reprimanded Tamon a few times when his negativity gets a little too dark and almost gets the best of him. An act that, from a certain angle, may be troublesome.
No matter how one sees it, though, Utage’s reasoning is always to support and infuse positivity back into Tamon. There’s no hostility, and not once does she think she’s above him! That’s a display of genuine tough love that reminds Tamon how much his presence means more to her than he thinks. If anything, the show helps remind its audience that people who think like Utage are still plenty, and that not all hope is lost.
Therefore, before the sweet scent of 2026 Valentine’s Day fades away, and the far-from-sad vibe of Singles Awareness Day tails behind, let’s pause and ask ourselves one simple, honest question:
Do I want to be in a toxic relationship?
If the answer is NO, then let’s start by not being the toxic one in the relationship. Loving someone or something doesn’t need to be a bittersweet affair. Beyond the drama and disappointments, it can still be a world we once called home. All we need to do is focus on the good and not the bad.
It works as effectively in fandom. Not everything will work out the way we want to. Instead of reacting negatively, staying calm and composed is always an option. And, probably, after a second, third, or fourth look, we may notice the silver lining and say, “It’s a fantastic time to be a fan!”
“There are going to be some fans who drift away.
And there’ll be some fans who won’t.”
— Ouri Sakaguchi, Tamon-kun Ima Docchi!? (Episode 6)
Originally published at https://f-cons.blogspot.com.
