What is Love
simply because I know that I can’t even understand myself.
Love is for the way you look at me
Love is such a beautiful feeling, you know? It started with two people or more that cared for each other until one day, they feel like, they are mates; or (exaggeratedly) soul mates. They feel like they need to take care of that person(s) no matter how difficult the situation is. Thye might feel like that’s the reason why they feel love in the first place.
Now let me sharpen my talks for tonight. First thing first, I’ll be talking about love as in a couple. Couple love. Isn’t that cute?
For me, it is.
Some say, love is a simple feeling of happiness. This little bit happiness could brighten up your day because somehow, you feel loved. This little bit of happiness could bring you to heaven on earth; just because, love can do everything. Love is a wonderful and powerful words where words even couldn’t described its own meaning.
By all means, I actually still haven’t understood what lays behind this simple four letter words but I’m here, trying to share what I know about love.
Contradicts by what I’ve said above, for me, love IS a simple feeling but on the other hand, it is NOT that simple.
Couple Love
Love is such an abstract feeling that sometimes it could hallucinated you to think that fairy tales exists.
Love is such a dangerous feeling that sometimes, it could turn someone to be filled by hatred because they can’t get the love they wanted.
Love, is something I rather fear of right now.
A good friend of mine once share this sentence, “Love is a happy feeling. If you don’t feel happy, it’s not love.”
The first time I read about her messages for me through a mobile messenger I was like, “then tell me, why does it hurt so much to care about a person you think you love?”
The simplest answer, ever:
It is not love then.
Teenagers are the most unstable human being that ever existed in earth. They are in a sensitive state when they begin to understand what’s behind the meaning of love. I, myself, am currently in this state. I’ve been learning to understand love in many stages of my love experiences.
“then tell me, why does it hurt so much to care about a person you think you love?”
There are actually some simple reasons to answer this love-drunk question.
Passion and Authority.
P a s s i o n
Passion (from the Latin verb patī meaning to suffer) is a term applied to a very strong feeling about a person or thing. Passion is an intense emotion compelling, enthusiasm, or desire for anything.
I rather call it a self-destruction-feeling. A feeling most people mistaken as falling in love.
A u t h o r i t y
Authority (əˈTHôritē,ôˈTHär-/)
Get thelostattics’s stories in your inbox
Join Medium for free to get updates from this writer.
noun: the power or right to give orders, make decisions, and enforce obedience. a person or organization having power or control in a particular, typically political or administrative, sphere.
The feeling of being wanted by the person you thought you love. The feeling of having a mutual feeling with your crush. You, I, we, demand those feelings. We demand for being wanted by the person whom we thought we love the most. We demand for a feeling which is not and never be able to be controlled.
Love.
It’s seriously sounds dangerous, isn’t it?
You could feel angry, mad, fed up, being like a jerk, being a self-centered person, egoist, childish, and those nasty feelings in one snap once you feel trap of ‘love’; or a feeling you thought, was love.
But on the other hand, love is also a feeling of caring to someone surrounded by warm happiness and joy. Sounds a little bit like Christmas, don’t you think?
Levels of Love?
I sometimes wonder if there are some levels in love as I also kind of self-concluded it as a term of “caring” for someone. I mean, come on, you guys also understand it well right that “caring” to friends is different from “caring” to someone you feel like crushing, right.
But somewhere between the line of friend and crush, this gap which I’ve been thinking turned out into the most dangerous gap ever, is the place that you don’t even know what you feel toward that special someone.
The Gap.
I used to walk in this gap of ambiguity and I don’t even enjoyed it one tiny bit. Well, maybe I did. The fluffiness of having a crush and those silly smiles I could make every time I got a message from him. Well, those were nice.
Anyway, this place is full of uncertainty and confusion because you can’t decide on how things should work or how you should feel toward that special someone.
That’s when it stroked me.
You can’t decide whom you love. You can’t decide on how you would feel toward someone.
At the end, I came up into a conclusion that this gap, is a place to meditate. To let your heart do the things, not the brain. Let them synchronized themselves and let them lead the way for the door you need to open.
The last but not the least, all you have to do is make the uncertainty into a certain feeling. Do what your heart needs to do and let the time answers you.
Twins?
Love is also not a feeling of completeness because you feel like you have met your twins.
A close friend of mine, recently, just told me this which I thought that hey, she was right. She said that a couple that fall in love means to complete each other because they are like missing puzzles which finally get to be together and completed each other. If you meet someone and feel like you ‘love’ them because you fond of his or her similarity of yours, you will probably mistaken those feelings.
I (finally, maybe) realized, it doesn’t suppose to be called as ‘love’. That’s what friends are for. To enjoy the fun and sad things together. To tease, laugh, jokes around, being sad, shares stories, to feel happy, together.
Yep, friends.
But, do you know what’s the best relationship ever for a couple that fall in love?
To be his/her friend while you both are a lover.
In a room with pillows and warmed by a cozy blanket.
Depok,
2014.
