Thoughts on a Viral Video
I just saw a video where a woman forgot to prepare her lunchbox and asked her husband to make it and bring it to her. While the incident itself might seem trivial, I drew two conclusions from it: her husband was incredibly perfunctory and selfish.
Why? The lunchbox contained some snacks—opened snacks, nearly finished ones at that. He probably just grabbed whatever was lying around at home and tossed it in. They're married, they've lived together for some time; it's impossible he doesn't know what his wife usually takes or eats for lunch. Yet, he still chose to simply stuff the lunch bag with random items. That's being perfunctory.
Taking a step back, even if the husband is genuinely busy and truly doesn't know, buying fast food on the way over isn't difficult. How could you, from meeting and getting to know your wife to marrying her, not know what she likes to eat? The blogger likely called her husband immediately, so time pressure wasn't the issue (elementary school lunch breaks in the US are at least an hour). Taking another step back, even if there was time pressure, buying fast food doesn't take much time.
This husband probably came from home (if he were at the office or out, even bought snacks would be new, not opened). This means he had sufficient time but was unwilling to spend it on the woman he's supposed to spend the rest of his life with. That's selfish.
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And there's another point: he brought his wife a two-day-old, almost empty box of burritos and a bag of dog food with a note attached saying, "Remember to bring the dog food back, the dog will run out." It shows he has common sense, which indirectly proves he had enough time. He knows living things get hungry. But he'd rather be considerate to the dog than to his wife. I truly suspect his internal ranking is: Himself > Dog > Wife.
He clearly could have done it, even done it well, but he directly chose not to. Truly a time and effort saver for him.
And the blogger, from start to finish, was laughing and giggling, showing off her husband. I don't even know if her reaction was real or fake anymore.
Personally, I think this phenomenon of showing off a husband is particularly evident among certain women, especially those who lacked love or had difficult childhoods. Because their lives aren't good but they can't leave, they try to gain validation from outsiders. Even if outsiders feel indifferent, they'll respond out of politeness. And these polite responses, nonetheless, reinforce their self-delusion. But it's understandable. Because they can't leave, can't get away, they can only rely on self-delusion, gain a sense of accomplishment from outsiders, and use that self-hypnosis to push through a difficult life.
My advice: people who haven't learned to love themselves shouldn't date. (Let's talk about that later, it's too much). What this blogger needs now isn't someone to bring her love, but a psychologist who can guide her.
