Ataraxia
April 12th, 2024
I shouldn't really be surprised that after several quiet and normal and easily managed days, finally a day will come that will test me. I feel very tired and can barely stand on my feet after getting home from work. I feel like my mind stopped providing analysis of the outside stimuli just to save me from being overloaded. I feel like just going through the motions — eat, stay hydrated, don't think or do anything. I know tomorrow I will feel better, but a nagging question has already found a comfortable and expanding niche in my mind — is that all there is to it? is that a normal situation to come home after work without having any energy and with a barely functioning brain? is it going to happen on Monday as well? and on Tuesday after that?
Get footsteps of the Furies’s stories in your inbox
Join Medium for free to get updates from this writer.
I found a new word by clicking through Wikipedia last evening — ataraxia. It is a philosophical idea that describes a state of being unperturbed by everything there is. Of course, as with all philosophical ideas, there are different schools of thought — does it pertain to being unperturbed in mind, or body, or maybe in both? I don't think I care and I am too tired to think more in-depth about it, and too tired to do any reading about it. I will just let this idea float in my head to settle for a more inviting time. All I know is that is something I want, and I should try to achieve it. By what means I haven't the slightest clue, but that can wait for tomorrow…
