escapril 2023
day 10: drug of choice
drug of choice, being 17 mindless, reckless and empty thoughts. they said to me to choose a role, choose a path. so i’ve been chosing wrong for more than a whole life. why am i not living my dream adulthood at 17? i’m a poet, not a researcher. i find, not am found. in words i get lost, in words i get rotten.
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day 13: blush
take my hand and make me blush, even much more make me rush. i’m always afraid of questions, being shy is one of my many-not blessings. the chemistry of this is already fucked up, i can’t wait to go home. school rings, school swings, i don’t want to be in their wishes, top A of the list, top A cutting my own wrist.
day 22: out of the window
out of the window things seem to be perfect. everyone says and has what’s worth it. and for me, seems to work, work for the knife as they say. i feel like i live in a different reality, where i’m not in a equality, they don’t feel as i feel, they don’t get hurt as i hurt to death. they don’t ache my aches, in every inch of my skin and i feel like being out of the window i’d be better and clean. the cars are bright, the lovers are happy and here i’d never heal.
