Let’s Begin
Have you ever found yourself trapped in a cycle of negative thinking, unable to shake off worries and anxieties after spiralling emotionally? It’s a tough place to be in, and as much as we hate to admit it, our ability to provide objective and constructive feedback can be compromised in these moments (and this makes me re-think the idea of self-help, more critically).
For me, this realization was especially challenging because the image of being in control is so appealing. I associate it with success, achievement, and ultimately, being accepted and loved. But this desire for control is linked to a deeper fear of not being in control, stemming from my experiences with a mentally ill parent.
After the anxious feelings subside, the road to recovery from a breakdown is never smooth for me. The emotional pain of reliving my mother’s experiences through empathy casts a shadow over my efforts.
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In this series, I’ll be delving into the topic of growing up with a mentally ill mother and its impact on my identity and approach towards different aspects of life.
Why am I doing this? Admittedly, I have the need to be seen and understood, as well as a dire need to have a sense of purpose.
However, I don’t want to come across as trying to redeem myself or playing the role of a martyr. This fear is one of the reasons why I choose to remain anonymous and have deleted so many of my similar creative exercises.
Ultimately, my goal is to reduce the pain and isolation that can come from being in my situation and very misunderstood, and to provide a space where others going though similar experiences can feel seen.
Join me on this journey of self-discovery and reflection as we explore the complexities of mental health and success.
