Alone —
Two Poems From Alfred Bualjak Biliu
Isaac Aju’s Poet Of The Month (September, 2026)
I do it all alone.
I take my first steps without
someone to hold me steady.
or give me words of encouragement.
I learn the way by walking it.
I stumble and fall.
There is a long silence
as nobody is there to help me carry
the weight of my failure.
I pick up the pieces
and turn them into lessons.
I succeed.
There is no crowd cheering,
no drum beating
but I know how hard I worked
to get there
and that is enough.
Even if people leave or don’t show,
I will stay firm like a tree
in an open field.
Strong and unbent.
I stand tall.
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Alone.
Smile
I smile not
because I have the things
that make my day bright
or laughable.
I smile not
because I have all the resources
a rich person has,
but because I realized
that even if I kept that feeling
in my gut,
it wouldn't help me, only affect me.
I smile not because I am happy,
but because I see nothing in keeping an awkward feeling.
I smile not because we have peace,
but because I want to relieve myself
from being affected by the prolonged stress of destruction.
I smile not with profound happiness,
but with the intention to confuse
the world into thinking that I am okay,
despite the long silence of fear
speaking the truth against those who
don't want to hear it.
I smile not because this country
gives what I wish a country would,
but as someone who chooses
to stay in a dark world of tyranny.
I force that smile just to forgive
myself alone, because continuing
like this wouldn't help me in the long run.
That's why I smile.
Alfred Bualjak Biliu is a South Sudanese poet and contributor on Words Not Yet Spoken.
