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Parental Love vs Spousal Love
Which bond runs deeper?
A few years ago, when my marriage clocked four years, in typical millennial manner, I sat down to reflect on the state of my marriage and the various emotions I felt for the men in my life.
One of the benefits, and understated privileges of growing up in a loving home, is that it sets the tone for the future relationship with your partners. For example, girls who grew up with affirming and loving fathers are likely to look for the same qualities in the men they eventually marry, and men with loving mothers subconsciously look out for similar qualities in their wives.
Many women who have had the good fortune of being raised by loving fathers, often find themselves comparing their husbands with their fathers, as do men who have also had the privilege of being raised by good mothers.
It is unhealthy and perhaps unfair, but we do it regardless.
The Dilemma of Comparison
We instinctively compare the love of those closest to us because they shape our understanding of love. Women for example would wonder, does my husband love me more than my father? Does he care for me with the same depth, would he be willing to make the same sacrifices as my father? Men may similarly reflect on the love they receive from their wives as compared with…
