How I Stopped the Morning Scroll
From a copywriter with a codependent work relationship
This used to be my morning routine…
Wake up. Snooze. Maybe snooze again. Open phone. Open Slack. Open email. Make coffee. Eat something fast. Sit at my desk.
What dictated how I felt about the day ahead was the number of notifications from Slack and email.
Was today going to be a sigh of relief or a sigh of stress?
I convinced myself that my stressors were due to everything around me, saying things like “If I only had more time” and “If my tasks weren’t so stressful,” then I would feel better.
But the truth is, I was stressing myself out thinking I’d find safety by knowing what my day ahead looked like. Yet, nowhere in my job description does it say, “Must check email first thing upon waking up.”
If you’re reading this, you might be feeling the same thing but can’t seem to stop checking your phone, despite knowing it’s not fueling you.
Here’s what I realized…
I was stuck in a codependent state with work. My boundaries weren’t great, despite no one expecting things from me. I longed for praise. I thought to myself, “Maybe if I create extra resources, respond at the speed of lightning, and beat my deadlines by a mile, then I will be recognized.”
But the recognition never came. And the reality was my actions were weaved with expectations and the need for external validation.
Don’t get me wrong — there is nothing wrong with being praised for hard work. But there is a problem when it becomes expected because expectation often equals disappointment.
Anyway, that’s where the phone piece comes in, with the belief that if I’m always available, I‘m a good employee.
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I‘d daydream about the days when I could show up at a physical workspace and not have the ability to check my email. “If only I could be in that place and time,” I’d think. The thing is, it’s easy to get caught up in the past when we are stuck. It was time to face the music and realize my current state.
Here’s how I stopped the scroll…
For many weeks, I thought I’d allow myself to check my phone for one minute only, then force myself to put it away — that way, I was aware of what my day was going to look like.
Let me tell you; it did not work.
Each day, I ended up scrolling for longer than a minute. I would start looking at different apps until I had scoured the internet long enough to get up and feel “meh” about the day.
Then one day…
My husband and I actually have app limits on our Instagram time, where we each have each other's passwords — that way, there is no room for “entering the screentime passcode” every 15 minutes to get more time.
I know his. He knows mine.
So I thought, why the HECK am I not applying this to the rest of my apps or creating a schedule where I can’t access anything until 9 am — once I’m at my desk?
Finally, I created a screen time schedule.
The next day, I woke up. Turned off my alarm. Glanced at my phone and thought, “Well, I guess there’s no going on there since there’s nothing to look at anyway.”
And it was the most blissful morning. I took time for my routine, knowing that I didn’t have to be at my desk or look at any of my apps until 9. I did my hair. Ate a wholesome breakfast. Wrote in my journal for 5 minutes.
What I’ve realized through all of this is: by setting boundaries, I am a happier employee. I have more time for the things I love (like writing this article). And most of all, the world did not end because I didn’t check my phone.
So if you have a buddy that you can swap screentime passwords with, I highly recommend it. And if you don’t, I am certain there are a lot of other apps out there that can help you limit screen time without being able to get around the passcode.
You might be thinking, “Damn. That’s one sad struggle,” or “I’m still struggling with this too,” but either way, I hope it helps you stop the scroll.
