Easy Money, Hard Consequences
The incomplete teaser of a headline caught my eye.
“The Receipt Under My Daughter’s Pillow — and her shortcut to…”
I needed to know what the receipt was for and where the shortcut led. I clicked the link.
The Medium article was written by Sophia K., a single mother who found a hidden receipt that led to learning her teen daughter was considering doing an OnlyFans-type of video (personally-filmed adult content) as a solution to a financial need, since she didn’t want to ask her struggling mother for money.
Her daughter told her there were ads everywhere telling girls not to waste time with school or jobs that pay nothing; that if they’re pretty and young, they should sign up to be a performer and potentially make millions.
The mother remained calmer than I might have in her shoes. She didn’t punish or control or talk down from a morally superior high ground. She recognized there was a problem and a temptation toward what appeared to be a potential solution. A solution that, to someone her daughter’s age, might seem like one they could retreat from at any time. Get in, get some money, and dip out, before anyone saw or knew.
But that is not how it works. That world takes big bites, not nibbles.
Instead of throwing angry words at each other, the mom and daughter sat down together and discussed the idea like it was an actual job offer.
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The mom drew three columns on the back of an old paper placemat. At the top of one column she wrote, “What it pays.” The next, “What it costs.” The last, “What it trains.”
They talked about the possible income versus what it would cost mentally, emotionally, and socially. Was the lure of fast cash worth trading her self-respect and the respect of those who knew her? How would the people she cared for feel about her choosing the easiest path?
They also talked about how such platforms normalize being used, ranked and monetized, while those who consume the content become poisoned toward women in ways that spill over into real life.
Her daughter had only wanted to solve a financial problem without burdening her mother, but the manner by which she would have removed that burden would have hurt her mom’s heart most of all.
The mother told her: “We will solve the money problem. But we won’t solve it by handing strangers a piece of you.”
I couldn’t help but think about the many financial struggles I went through when my daughter was young, and how aware she was of those struggles. For great chunks of her childhood, I worked a full-time job and a part-time job and freelanced on the side. She knew more about debt ratios and credit scores as a teen than most ever do as adults.
The article made me feel fortunate that OnlyFans and that ilk weren’t around when my girl was in school. I know my struggles worried her then. She saw how tired I was. How thinly spread. I’m grateful she dodged the temptation of that particular bullet.
I feel for parents of teens, with the many added complications that the internet and social media have brought. The challenge of trying to raise children to have a work ethic in a world rife with shortcuts and online influencers waving fists full of money as they drive fancy cars and live in opulent homes, which they “earn” by performing in front of a camera.
Selling their soul by the slice. Or the click.
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The Medium article referenced here, which includes exceptional advice on parenting teens, can be found by clicking HERE.
