A brief defense of booktok
Booktok is a controversial community within the Internet. On the surface, booktok is just a small community on TikTok for book lovers to discuss and recommend books. However, it goes deeper than that.
Even within the booktok community, there are different conversations going on. The various nonfiction, fantasy, horror, etc., enthusiasts are all having their own separate discussions under the booktok hashtag. But discord about the community has everyone focused on one particular group: the dark romance enthusiasts.
Dark romance is a genre that explores darker themes and tropes within the romance genre. The characters are morally-grey and there is often explicit content.
Some criticisms against this side of booktok are that these novels are simply porn, or that they reflect what women actually want in their romantic partners.
As someone who is not a personal fan of the genre, I do find that the criticisms can be problematic. Take video games as a counter-example.
When thinking about the typical consumer of these two types of media, dark romance is usually associated with women, just like video games are associated with men. Neither of these things are actually gendered activities, of course. But we are talking about stereotypes for now.
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Just like dark romance novels, many video games have violence and dark themes within their gameplay. Unlike the novels though, as an active player, you can make decisions on whether to fight, or run, or hide. Readers simply go where the author takes them.
Let’s take a popular violent video game series, Resident Evil. During a gameplay session, the player will assault, kill, steal, and otherwise harass the various NPCs. That doesn’t mean they’re a real-life criminal once they log off.
The themes in the dark romance books are extreme as well. However, no matter how disturbing the themes may be, reading these books doesn’t necessarily reflect what a person believes is right or wrong. Just like video games (or dramas, movies, and scrolling on TikTok), reading dark romance is a form of escapism.
In the past, society has had the conversation regarding whether or not violent video games actually make people more violent. Maybe the dark romance readers are just having their turn.
I think that’s fine. We should take notice of where we are focusing our attention, and why. Why are people reading dark romance and playing violent video games? It’s a question worth asking.
The problem lies in measuring these things unfairly. If the media we consume reflects who we really are, then that should be true for everyone, not just women. So, if the women who enjoy dark romance are reading the genre because the characters reflect what they actually want in a relationship, then the men who play violent video games must do so because it reflects their inner violent tendencies.
In my opinion, most adults, regardless of gender, are able to understand that the rules regarding what is right and wrong are flexible within the context of a game or story. It’s demeaning to imply that people in the booktok community can’t.
