Beyinless - DAY 2
Just 45 days.Just 45 days left until the first part of the exam. We’re still racing down the same track alongside the other “racehorses.” As the exam approaches, you can almost feel the surge of ego in the air. Even those who spent the entire year doing nothing but watching gaming videos on YouTube suddenly start acting like professors.
Of course, their true colors are quick to show during lessons. But after class? That’s a whole different story. They put on their “intellectual” glasses, grab books they’ll never actually read (but carry around just to impress), and start giving life advice to other students. They lecture on time management as if they’ve mastered it themselves.
And me? I’m stuck in indecision. I know I’m far from being in a position to give anyone advice. Instead, I’d rather quietly work on improving myself, away from the crowd. But that has its downsides too. Being a loner often means you’re labeled as “weak” by the other racehorses. They’ll give you those pitying glances, as if you’re some kind of fool. And if you’re shy like me, and not the type to share your thoughts with everyone, all you can do is wait. Just wait.
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To cope with this weird situation, I think I’ve found an unusual solution: watching comedy movies. Even though I’ve never been a big fan of the genre, they’ve been surprisingly helpful. Growing up, I thought most comedy films were just about someone falling down while everyone else laughs at them - essentially an hour of cheap slapstick that the writer somehow expected the audience to find funny.
But recently, I’ve discovered there are so many different types of comedy. Some of them are actually great for boosting your motivation while studying. Who knew?
One last thing I’ve noticed lately: this obsession with “maturity.” It’s as if my peers are trying so hard to hide their real personalities. They want to appear knowledgeable about everything, to sound like the modern-day Socrates in every conversation.
Am I any different? Not really. Sure, there are topics I feel I know more about than most. But my shyness, combined with the fact that people often treat being wrong as a crime, keeps me from sharing my thoughts. I end up having silent debates with myself in my own head.
I just hope this is all temporary, that it all ends with the exam. Because I’m so tired of these racehorses. I’m tired of myself too - because no matter how much I pretend otherwise, I’m still just another horse running on the same track…
