Interpersonal Communications (Final Takeaways)
by Maria West
Communication is something we use every day, but we do not always think about how important it is. Before taking COM 120, I thought communication was mostly about talking to other people. This class taught me that there is much more to it. The way we listen, react, handle disagreements, and build relationships all involve communication. Here are the final takeaways I gained from this course.
Communication Is More Complicated Than It Looks
Before this class, I never really thought deeply about communication. We talk to people every day, so it seems like something that should be easy. But I learned that just because you said something does not mean the other person understood it the way you meant it. A lot can go wrong between what one person means and what the other person understand. That is why being clear matters. Sometimes you have to explain yourself, ask questions, or even say something a different way. Good communication takes more effort than I realized.
Sometimes, You Just Need to Listen
I have had numerous conversations where i could tell that the other person was not really listening. Maybe they were on their phone or just waiting for their chance to talk. This class made me realize that listening is a huge part of communication. You do not always need to have the perfect response. Sometimes people just want to know that you are actually hearing what they are saying.
We Don’t All See Things the Same Way
Something else that stuck with me is how differently two people can see the exact same situation.
One person might think a comment was a joke while another person takes it seriously. Someone might think a person is being quiet because they are angry when they are actually just tired. Our experiences and feelings affect the way we understand other people. I think this is important because we are sometimes quick to assume we know why somebody did something. It is better to ask or hear their side before deciding what they meant.
Facial expressions and mood tells a story
Someone can say, “I’m fine” and you can immediately tell from their voice that they are definitely not fine. Someone can also say something nice, but their tone can make it sound rude or sarcastic.
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I knew body language mattered before taking this class but I did not realize how much information we give people without actually saying anything.
Being Close Doesn’t Mean Being Together All the Time
You can care about someone and still want time to yourself. People want connection, but they also want independence. Those two things can exist at the same time. A friend wanting some alone time does not automatically mean they are upset with you. The same thing can happen with family members or people in romantic relationships. Every relationship needs a balance. You should be able to feel close to someone without feeling like you always have to be around them.
Arguments Aren’t Always a Sign That Something Is Wrong
Conflict and arguements are usually seen as a bad thing, but this class changed the way I think about it. If two people are close, they are eventually going to disagree about something. That is normal. The bigger issue is how they handle the disagreement. Yelling, insulting each other and or refusing to listen can make a small problem much worse. But if both people explain how they feel and actually listen to each other, conflict can sometimes help solve a problem. You do not need a relationship with zero disagreements. You need to know how to deal with disagreements when they happen.
Power Shows Up in Everyday Conversations
When I used to hear the word “power,” I thought about people with authority. But power can show up in regular relationships too. A manager has power at work. A teacher has authority in a classroom. Someone can also have power because they know more about a certain subject or because other people respect them. Having power does not automatically mean a bad thing. The problem is when someone uses it to pressure or control another person.
Not Everyone Has to Be Your Best Friend
I liked learning about strong and weak ties because it made me think about all the different people we interact with. Obviously, best friends and family can be very important. But classmates, coworkers, neighbors, and people we only talk to occasionally can matter too. For example, a classmate you barely speak to might tell you about an internship or opportunity you never knew existed. A coworker might introduce you to someone who later becomes a best friend.
You Are Allowed to Have Privacy
Being close to a person does not mean they need to know every single thing about you. This is something I think people sometimes forget. You can trust someone and still have things you would rather keep private. At the same time, we usually want to share certain things with the people we are close to and love. Finding that balance can be difficult, but privacy does not automatically mean someone is being dishonest. People are allowed to have boundaries even in romantic relationships.
Interpersonal communication is something I am actually going to use in my everyday life
I will use it with my family and friends. I will use it at school and at work. I will use it when I meet new people, when I disagree with someone, and when I have to explain how I feel. I probably will not remember every term from the textbook years from now but I can remember the bigger lessons behind them. Pay attention to more than words!! Respect people’s boundaries !! And understand that disagreements are going to happen!!Communication is something we do every day, which is exactly why learning how to do it better matters.
