Lone
We all know what it feels like to smile when we’re happy, laugh when something is funny, cry when we’re sad, and feel numb when things get too hard to handle. But there’s one feeling that’s different from all the rest: loneliness. It’s strange, because when we’re lonely, we can feel everything at once — happy, sad, empty, and full of emotions we don’t even understand. We were born alone, even though we came from the love of our mother’s womb. So, if loneliness is such a terrible thing, why were we created this way? Why did the universe decide that we should enter the world alone, if being alone was so bad? Could it be that loneliness isn’t as bad as we think, and maybe it’s even something the universe planned for us?
In 2024, I lost almost everything I had worked so hard to build. It felt like the world was against me, like nothing I did was ever going to make me happy again. I was surrounded by people, but I felt completely alone, disconnected from everything and everyone. It was a feeling I had never experienced before, and I didn’t know what to do with it. The losses kept coming, one after the other, and I felt like life was falling apart around me. I didn’t know how to handle it. I wasn’t just sad — I felt nothing. Or maybe I felt everything, all at once.
They say we are born alone, and we will die alone. But when I think about it, from the moment we are born, we’re never truly alone. There’s one thing we get from the very beginning — love. It starts when we’re still in our mother’s womb, when she begins to love us before we even take our first breath. This love grows with us, and when we are born, it surrounds us in many forms: the love of our parents, the love of family, the love of friends, and eventually romantic love. Even if we don’t always feel loved, it’s there, deep inside of us, because we’ve known love from the moment we started to exist.
Think about it — when we’re babies, we know what love feels like. We feel it when our mother holds us, when family members kiss us, when friends care for us as we grow up. Even if life is hard and we don’t always have love in the way we want, that early experience of love is still inside of us. It’s why we search for love our whole lives. We want to feel connected to people, to feel cared for, and to know that we matter. This is why loneliness can feel so empty and painful — because it feels like we’ve lost something we’ve had since the very beginning.
But here’s the thing: every part of life has two sides. Where there’s happiness, there’s sadness. Where there’s light, there’s darkness. And where there’s love, there’s loneliness. The two go hand in hand. We can’t have one without the other. When we love deeply, we also open ourselves up to the possibility of feeling lonely. But that doesn’t mean loneliness is bad. It’s just a part of the journey.
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Loneliness isn’t a punishment. It’s a reminder of how important love is in our lives. And sometimes, loneliness is the place where we can discover the love that has been inside of us all along. Even when it feels like no one else is there, the love we’ve experienced in life stays with us. It’s not just about the love we get from others — it’s also about the love we carry within ourselves.
All the studies in psychology and even spiritual teachings often tell us one important thing: true happiness comes from being at peace within ourselves. They remind us that, although we are always looking for love from others — whether it’s from family, friends, or a partner — the most important love is the one we give to ourselves. From the moment we’re born, we start craving love and attention from the outside world, thinking that’s what will make us whole. But these studies tell us something deeper: we need to learn to love ourselves first, to feel that we are enough, and to find our own sense of joy from within.
It’s not easy, because we’ve been taught that happiness comes from outside — from the people around us, from things we can get, or from the love we receive. But the truth is, external love will come and go. People change, situations shift, and sometimes the love we thought would last forever disappears. If we only depend on that, we will be lost when it’s gone. That’s why learning to love ourselves is so important. When we can be blissfully at peace within, when we can feel full and complete without needing someone else to make us feel that way, we won’t be shaken when the outside world changes. We’ll know that no matter what, we have something inside of us that can’t be taken away.
It’s not about rejecting the love from others — love is beautiful, and we need it in our lives. But these studies show us that the strongest, most lasting love is the love we have for ourselves. When we can be happy with who we are, when we can find peace in our own company, we won’t feel empty when the outside world lets us down. We will always have that inner light, that inner love, to carry us through the hardest times. And that, perhaps, is the most powerful thing of all.
Even though self-love and finding inner peace seem to be the answer, there’s still a lingering question: is it really worth it to live like that in a world full of people, relationships, and experiences? Is it enough to just rely on ourselves, to be blissfully alone, when we’re surrounded by so much life, connection, and love from others? It’s a hard thing to balance. We are human, after all, and part of being human is the deep, natural desire to connect with others. We crave friendships, family, companionship, and all the beautiful moments we share with people. So, is it worth living a life where we try to rely only on ourselves, while everything around us invites us to reach out, to love, and to be loved?
It’s a tough question because we live in a world where we are constantly interacting with others, and those connections bring us so much joy, comfort, and meaning. But at the same time, if we only depend on others for our happiness, we risk being shattered when those connections fade or change. So maybe the real answer lies somewhere in between — loving ourselves enough to find peace within, while still embracing the love and connections the world has to offer. It’s about knowing that while we can’t control everything around us, we always have the power to hold onto the love we’ve nurtured within ourselves. And maybe that’s how we live in a world full of people: by giving and receiving love, but never losing sight of the love we carry inside.
So, instead of fearing loneliness, maybe we can learn to embrace it. It’s a quiet place where we can reflect, grow, and remember that love is always within us, even when it feels distant. Loneliness gives us the chance to reconnect with ourselves, to understand that we are enough, and to find strength in our own company. It’s not something to run from but something to welcome with open arms. Because, deep down, we are never truly alone — love has been with us since the moment we took our first breath, and it will remain with us, no matter what. And in those moments when the world feels heavy and the silence too deep, we can find comfort in knowing that the love we seek has always lived within our hearts.
