Breaking taboos with grace
Originally written in 2018
Priyanka Chopra and Nick Jonas recently got married in India, which brought in a lot of attention. It was scandalous to some of us although we are no one to interfere in anyone’s personal lives but since they are celebrities and “they have chosen this no privacy life”, people just had to comment on their marriage. I was one of them but later I realized how wrong I was. Not shipping them is another thing and everyone should have their own opinion but shaming the woman for marrying someone not her age or not from her own country is just wrong. It’s entirely her own opinion and if she’s happy with her decision, who are we to comment on her relationship? Alas, this Pakistani society will never refrain from doing so. Gossiping and in the end saying “sanu ki?” (So what), acting like they didn’t hurt anyone by commenting and judging them and as if they just didn’t kill a million hopes and dreams.
Priyanka marrying someone younger than her, mind you a marriage that is CONSENSUAL, is so scandalous to some of you and yet there are young girls in our society who are FORCIBLY married to men twice or thrice their age every single day and none of you bat an eye. Where they are denied their youth and education but we just choose to instead say, “us ke maa baap ki majboori ho gee”. Sad. This shows our country’s mentality.
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Though I am nobody to comment, but here’s why I think Priyanka and Nick did a wonderful thing. Age difference of 11 years, especially with the WOMAN being older. Woman being taller than the man. Different skin tone. Different languages. Different religions. Different nationalities. Yet defied by love. Love conquers all. Priyanka Chopra and Nick Jonas breaking taboos with grace. Breaking all these stereotypes with elegance. I hope to see love and harmony prevail in our intolerant Pakistani society. In a society where a Shia can’t marry a Sunni because of these absurd religious differences and vice versa. Where the elite feels disgraced being associated with someone who isn’t that well off. Where any girl (older or younger) is rejected for her age and skin colour or not being ‘white enough’ or ‘fit enough’. Where the opinions of others matter more than ones own wishes and happiness. “Haw log kya kahenge, apne se chote larke se shaadi kar li?”
As a matter of fact, I would actually like to thank Priyanka and Nick for setting an example for people who want to be different to follow. They have proved that love can exist beyond caste, religion, nationality, ones beliefs and ethics and that love knows no race, no age, no labels and no limits.
Meanwhile in Pakistan: fair, skinny, under 25, same caste, virgin, either a doctor daughter in law or a lawyer daughter in law, well educated yet not too educated, religious yet a bit modern, makes round rotis, covers hair, no premarital affairs etc. are the basic demands of mothers for their so called prince sons. Prince sons who later on (most of the time) treat their wives with so much disrespect and look down upon them. Shame them based on their looks and habits, taunt them. How sad.
Being a part of the future generation of this country, I hope to see love prevail in a society where labels don’t matter and feelings do. Where all these pretenses aren’t important and where there is mutual respect and consent. Where your own happiness is given more importance than what others would think of you.
“Kuch tou loug kahenge, logoun ka tou kaam hi hai kehna”
That being said, Congratulations to the beautiful couple. Wishing them a lifetime of happiness! I hope many follow suit and learn to love and respect one another despite their differences. Their engagement should be an eye opener for all those people who still make a fuss about such differences. Marriage is not about age or all these differences, pretenses or appearances for the sake of others, it’s about finding the right person for yourself and your own happiness over everything else. Remember, it’s YOU who has to spend the rest your life with that person not the society.
