True Pleasures
We may claim that travel, jewelry and other big spends are big pleasures. Yet if a pleasure meter were attached to our brain, I’d guess that simpler pleasures would score higher. Take travel: Remember that the days before and after are a scramble, during often involves racing to the airport, through TSA, flight delay, getting lost, getting ripped off, and soon tiring of yet another church, museum, or ruin. Jewelry’s excitement has a short half-life. Yes, there’s the ooh-ahh on first seeing it, but that usually quickly evanesces into a not-noticed part of life. Same with new clothes, furniture, whatever.
I’d guess that most people’s pleasure meter would score higher from:
Listening to favorite music.
Petting your doggie.
That first taste of a favorite: ice cream, cake, soda, pizza, steak, beer, coffee. Subsequent tastes ain’t bad either.
Rewatching a favorite movie or rereading a favorite book.
A favorite ritual: perhaps morning or bedtime, Easter egg hunt, leading a Passover seder.
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Looking at what you love: your garden, nature, a beautiful face.
Window shopping. They’re like museums in which you can buy the stuff, but if you don’t, looking is free.
Helping someone with your time. It really does feel better to give than to receive, perhaps because you feel generous rather than beholden. Giving money to charity doesn’t do it — You rarely see the benefit. Your money just goes into a big pot.
Praying. Unlike services in which you’re just listening or passively reciting, when you pray, you’re involved and it’s individualized. If your prayers get answered, it’s a bonus. The sure benefit is in the process.
One of my faves is taking my morning walk with the dog, ending up in a cafe, and outlining what I’m going to write for you and thinking about my day’s clients while enjoying coffee — Caffeine boosts my mood and brainpower.
Another fave is driving while listening to a podcast or audiobook. I was a colicky baby and my parents said that the sure-fire calmer was being in the car. Still is.
What are your true pleasures?
I read this aloud on YouTube.
Marty Nemko is a career and personal coach, and author of 36 books including How to Do Life. You can reach him at mnemko@gmail.com
