Empowerment through Control: Shaping Your Journey
I am guilty, just as I suppose everyone else is, about misunderstanding the word “control” the way I have. I did not understand its importance until a little late in my youth. You will excuse me, I often feel like I have lived a thousand times over.
Many young people will say that, but when I say I have lived a thousand times over, I am not just speaking about experiences; I speak of wisdom and understanding. My years and experiences were not wasted. When I look in the mirror, I am often surprised that my curls are still as black as midnight, minus a few wisdom silver strands, which I refuse to dye or hide because I am determined to one day age gracefully.
I saw the word “control” just as everyone did. A word to snare at and frown upon. A word that seemed like the impossible that only a fool would think it was possible. After all, with a world filled with so many abnormalities, the unknown and unpredictable, the idea of having control seemed naive and foolish.
That was until the day I became comfortable with myself. I suddenly grew to know myself. I became aware of my strengths and limitations and an ease settled around me — confidence, the desire to flow. I became confident and understood my place in this world and in the lives of those around me. And suddenly, I wanted to flow.
I understood my end and saw where I was heading. Though it frightened me, it pleased me and brought me joy. My path was set out before me as clear as noonday and I knew that whichever way I walked down that path was unlimited joy and peace.
Comfortable, confident, flow… control?
It doesn’t sound right now, does it?
It was not some time ago that I learned how important the word control is. It’s not just a word the arrogant uses to describe having command of something that clearly eludes humanity. It is not just a word used by therapists, guidance counsellors or self-proclaimed spiritual gurus to claim mastery of one’s spirit.
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The word control unfolded to reveal its true self. The word control is an active and deliberate word. It is not a reflex or a feeling to hide one’s insecurities. It is the word of a leader, one facing a horde of challenges with a purpose to destroy and dismantle. The leader, though at first shaken, stares down the horde and strategically directs its fire in a neutral direction or strategically implements solutions to distinguish the flames of tragedy.
Interestingly enough, when faced with a challenge, our first reaction is shock, sometimes paralysis and then fear. For some of us, we learn to brace against the challenge and become unmoved by it. There is a sudden sense of boredom once you have endured hardship and challenges over your life.
But then, over time, a new person develops. It’s not that person who simply braces for impact. It’s this new internal voice emerging to guide you through the challenge.
It whispers like steel and cool against the mental walls of your head and heart, “Control.” And you listen… your arms, legs and mind begin to implement structures and boundaries to… no — not defend but tame the wild horde now standing a breath away from you, its heat scorching your face.
Control reveals another new meaning. It is the word of an explorer who guides his/her vision with a strategic mind. No longer are you swept away in a whirlwind of fantasy; your steps are stronger, more deliberate and your path is marked with significant milestones.
Through steps unmoved by the blushing morning light, the smoothness of the seemingly paved dirt road and the gentle sway of branches forming a canopy over your head, this new path emerges in all its glory and endless opportunities. Through a heart, though drunken from joy and satisfaction, unmoved by the widening of the once narrow sliver of light and the glorious breath of victory.
And as the branches sway down, leaning forward to yield their fruits in abundance for consumption, one word dances off your lips — Control.
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