**If I Was Paid a Dollar for Every…
Funny how I didn't know what this was going to be.
The sentence just arrived.
If I was paid a dollar for every…
And then I stopped.
Because apparently the sentence had arrived without the rest of the thought.
So I started filling in the blank.
If I was paid a dollar for every time I said, "I'll figure it out."
If I was paid a dollar for every time I said "just one episode" and meant it.
If I was paid a dollar for every time I convinced myself I was finally over something, only to find myself thinking about it again at an unreasonable hour.
If I was paid a dollar for every text I drafted, reread, and then sent a much worse version of.
If I was paid a dollar for every relationship I thought would last longer than it did.
If I was paid a dollar for every time I said "we should hang out soon" and both of us knew we wouldn't.
If I was paid a dollar for every time my mind turned a perfectly ordinary moment into an emergency.
If I was paid a dollar for every time I Googled a symptom and immediately regretted it.
If I was paid a dollar for every habit I swore I had left behind, only to meet it again when I was tired, lonely, bored, or simply not paying attention.
If I was paid a dollar for every time I rehearsed an argument in the shower and won it decisively.
If I was paid a dollar for every time I looked at someone else's life and briefly wondered if I was doing mine wrong.
If I was paid a dollar for every plan that made perfect sense until life got involved.
I would probably have enough money by now to stop worrying about money.
Probably.
But that's the strange thing about a sentence like this.
There is always another ending.
Another memory.
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Another person.
Another version of yourself you haven't quite figured out what to do with.
Some endings are funny.
Some are embarrassing.
Some make you realise you've been repeating the same story in different clothes.
Some are so ordinary you almost miss them.
The message you never sent.
The friendship that slowly became a memory.
The person you thought you'd forget quickly.
The habit you thought you'd outgrown.
The little thing that made you laugh when you were having a terrible day.
The decision you made with absolutely no idea what would happen next.
Maybe that's why I like the unfinished sentence.
If I was paid a dollar for every…
It can become almost anything.
Life. Love. Money. Work. Friendship. Panic. Growing up. Losing people. Finding yourself. Losing yourself for a little while and finding yourself somewhere else.
I don't think I want to decide too early what belongs here.
Some days I might have something serious to say.
Some days it might be something ridiculous.
Some days it might be something I've been carrying for years without knowing it had a name.
And some days, I might simply notice something and wonder if anyone else has noticed it too.
So I'll leave the sentence open.
Maybe that's what makes it interesting.
There is no shortage of things we could put in the blank.
There never really was.
If you were paid a dollar for every ______, what would you be rich from?
