the reality of abuse, both ways.
Abuse (verb)
1. To treat in a harmful, injurious, or offensive way
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2. To use wrongly or improperly
Abuse never stops. It never leaves. The abuse that the 1 in 4 women in the U.S and the 1 in 10 men in the U.S, it lives in them. The mental toll that abuse takes on a human being can outlive the physical, sometimes maybe being more painful. The depression, anxiety, and other mental issues that come with being in a place where you feel unvalued, unloved, and out of control. They put victims — no, survivors, in a tough position to get out of. Keep in mind that the statistics I provide are only include the survivors who have spoken up. But let’s talk about that.
Why do people who escape these horrible situations not speak up? Get their justice? Many survivors of abuse stay silent, not because they’re weak, but because the world often gives them no safe place to speak. They fear not being believed, being blamed, or facing more harm if they come forward. Shame is another heavy weight. Abusers often manipulate victims into thinking the abuse was their fault. For men, toxic ideas about masculinity can make speaking up feel impossible. For women, social pressure to stay quiet or “forgive” can be overwhelming. And when the legal system fails to protect survivors, it reinforces the message that their voices don’t matter. But their silence isn’t proof the abuse didn’t happen. It is proof that we need to create a world where they are safe, believed, and supported when they do speak.
Abuse is not a competition. Trauma doesn’t need to be measured to be valid. It is not a sign of weakness, and it should never stop you from living the way you please. Abuse isn’t just physical, its mental, verbal and emotional. “You look ugly in that skirt”, “Are you sure you want to order that, you’ve been gaining some weight”, “you were asking for it” . These are all forms of abuse along with so many more. If they hit around you, they will hit you. If they hit you, they will kill you. An abuser may claim they are sorry or that it won’t happen agin but it will. Deep down we both know that. Never be scared to ask for help, to move on, or to cry. Always remember that nobody deserves to be treated less than, even you. If you are being abused please reach out to a friend, a family member, or even a kind stranger in the bar bathroom. If you know someone is being abused, or if you even think there are signs, don’t second guess yourself or the situation. It is always better to be safe than sorry.
