Refusing To Study
This tittle may seem a little odd. I am in school, shouldn’t I be studying? Or at the very least trying to make decent grades so I can graduate with a semi-decent GPA? Well, the answer to both of those questions is yes.
Truth be told, I really don’t feel like doing schoolwork right now. Instead, I’d rather type out my problems. For what reason? Actually, there is quite a few reasons as to why I’d choose to publish random nonsense on the internet for nobody to actually read.
Primarily, I have been focusing on improving my typing speed on different types of keyboards. On my laptop I can type a solid 85 WPM wrapped up in my bed. Yet on the library computers I can only manage to pull out 75 WPM, accounting for errors.
Personally, I blame the differing speeds on the keyboard lay outs. I am used to the keys being spaced further apart, my hands are rather small, yet the left takes up roughly half of the library computers keyboard. It also does not help that the majority letters I type are with my left hand, frequently inching over to the right side of the keyboard.
In my ideal world, I could tape at 90+ WPM with no errors on every keyboard. To achieve this, I do type tests every day on the site Ten Fast Fingers. Admittingly the results have not been very apparent. So, I have been wondering if it's a personal issue. Until I can diagnose as to what is holding me back from the 90 WPM threshold, simple practice will be what I use.
Typing tests are great and all, but a sixty second test isn’t standing between me and the canvas assignments. As much as my brain would rather be inputting random words, that does not change the fact that this is a nonsense blog post which isn’t even grammatically correct.
My second reason makes more sense than the first, I guess. I don't want to do class work on a Monday morning before class. Yesterday I spent several hours on class work, and hazing modules for my sorority. When I was not doing class work, I was editing an essay. Since, unlike my blog posts I care when actual writing is not up to standards. I guess it comes down to who will be reading it. With an essay I can guarantee time will be taken up with the submitted work. People who read blogs do it of their own free time with their own free will.
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I stayed up till eleven last night doing classwork, so is it completely unreasonable to not want to do it the next day? Except, I have two tests tomorrow.
Part of me is tempted to convert the test material into an article and publish it on the internet, with the appropriate sourcing and citations as if it were an essay. Admittingly, that is rather time consuming. Since it's only a little over 24 hours before both exams, I feel as if it's not in my best interest.
To make things worse, I can’t even focus on those two classes without my brain transporting myself into a fantasy world deeply imbedded within my imagination. When was the last time I paid attention in class? Honestly, I don’t even know.
The temptation to write about my characters in a stupid amount of depth is very much there. I mean it's one of the few topics in which my introverted self-shows actual interest in the conversation / rambling. Now, this is bad since it probably causes me to come off as self-absorbed. Back in high school people used to ask me if I hated them. Then I’d be like no, who are you?
I mean I did switch schools my senior year, and it's not as if I put any effort to talk to this person. Except for the causal WTF glances when they said something extremely out of pocket. The glances were not even negative, just the classic look of confusion.
For reference, I was and still a full-fledged band kid. I said stupid things all the time, especially in that relaxed environment. Looking back, whenever my friends said extremely out of pocket things I laughed after the glance. Whereas my face just stayed in a state of confusion with other people.
Now, that went down into a tangent. If you are reading this, I express my condolences. Except, if you’re someone I personally know. Then you deserve every bit of this random ass thought process, in the library instead of doing my actual work.
The third reason as to why schoolwork seems impossible at the moment, is classic college burn out. I took a full course load back-to-back, my summers filled with long assignments given within a short amount of time. I used to submit everything on time. Now, its a challenge. I have calculated what I can and can submit, instead of just actually doing it. My brain is in need of a break, a substantially longer break than what a nap can provide. Soon the semester will be over, and I will have a month left to re-charge hopefully fixing the internal battery.
Make sure to avoid college burnout if you want a perfect GPA. It is so much more than just laziness, more like a feeling of defeat. I hate it so much, all I want is to be successful, well rested, with a typing speed of 90+ words per minute. Some hours at work would also be amazing. College is expensive and sorority dues don’t pay themselves.
