The most over-rated acts in music (2000–2025)
Can it really be 2025 already? I swear it can’t be more than 10 years since I was watching the fireworks as we celebrated the new millenium. As 25 years have passed, an official generation I’m (un)reliably informed, now is as good a moment as any to start a conversation here/in the pub about which artists in the world of pop music deserve knocking down a peg or two. Partially based on merit, but mostly (as all good lists should be), on nothing more than personal taste and forthright opinions masquerading as actual facts when they are clearly nothing of the sort. Have a read and see which artists you love made it on the list and feel free to be suitably appalled at my poor judgement and complete disregard for common decency. Oh, the scandal!
10. Taylor Swift
I like Taylor. She’s written some fabulous stuff. The 10-minute version of All Too Well and her lockdown folk records deserve all the accolades they get, but let’s be honest… whither the roll call of huge, household-name timeless pop classics? She occupies a weird space we’ve not seen in pop music before (certainly in my lifetime) where an artist can sell out stadiums and be adored by millions across the world, but the average Joe in the street would be hard-pushed to name 3 songs by her. She is, in theory, as big as Michael Jackson or Madonna. But also just saying that out loud makes you sound silly. It’s a strange one, hence why she creeps onto this list so we can pontificate what it all really means. Or not.
9. Nick Cave
Nick Cave is cool. Like, really fucking cool. I wish he was my Uncle. Sadly, his mostly dreary musical output is nothing but a disappointment. I still love him though.
8. Radiohead/anything Thom Yorke goes near
Radiohead have made some absolute classics in their time, but the last was In Rainbows which was something like 17 years ago. The real bug bear is that you literally cannot dare to even remotely suggest that something Thom Yorke has been involved with isn’t a work of genius or the most over-sensitive fans in the history of rock will come at you with pitchforks and denounce you as a heretic. So I’m just going to be the first person in the history of the internet to be brave enough to state what we all know is true: Thom Yorke’s a really, really dog-awful lyric writer.
7. Red Hot Chili Peppers
Jesus, these guys are still going? There was some weird glitch in the matrix in around 1990 because somehow the RHCP were deemed edgy when they were clearly embarrassingly naff. Even more worrying is how often they still get forced onto us in a way that makes me feel violated. How the hell these chancers (terrible guitarist, Vanilla Ice level rapping, dreadful cod-funk) get any kind of airtime defies rational explanation. Blame your parents. They are a travesty. Even the much-maligned Extreme were miles better than this garbage and it’s still illegal to make that claim in at least 39 US states. Banish them!
6. Kasabian
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Speaking of ungodly acts committed upon the ears of a nation… thank your lucky stars Kasabian never made it big across the Atlantic. Take all the fun, soul and madcap genius out of the Happy Mondays and stick in a wife-beater for good measure. Ladies and gentleman, I present to you Kasabian. A band, who beyond all levels of rational comprehension, manage to be even shitter than the Chili Peppers.
5. Arctic Monkeys
Ah, the Arctic Monkeys. I know damn well I’m not alone in thinking: “Why are they still a thing?”. Fair enough, their debut was arguably the quintessential English mid-noughties landfill indie record. It was good at the time — like wet snogs behind the bike sheds or eating a family size bag of peanut M&Ms in one go — but that’s nostalgia for you. It doesn’t mean it’s something you’d necessarily think was great once you become a fully qualified adult. They then released an over-cooked sophomore (the usual weaker songs, glossier production) which contained that abysmal nadir Victoria Wood one where he goes on about fishnets, and spent the next 5 years doing penance by trying to be the Queens of the Stone Age before briefly striking gold with AM. Their last two albums are dreadful and anyone who tries to tell you differently is beyond hope. Whisper it, but Razorlight might have actually been the band we should have loved all along. And who would ever have thought we’d be saying that in 2025?
4. Billie Eilish
I really wanted to like her but she is just so… industry. How many zillions of dollars of promo did this girl get? We woke up one day and Billie was massive. She went from nowhere to inexplicably inescapable in the time it takes to boil a kettle. I cringe every time another 50+ year old male rocker namechecks liking her “as an artist”. Bad Guy was a novelty and Birds of a Feather is half-decent, but I really fail to see much more than a whole lot of isn’t-she-relatable marketing. If only she had a moody kick-ass pop song half as good as Everything is Embarrassing and I might just get what all the fuss was about. But she doesn’t.
3. Ed Sheeran
Ed Sheeran is the harmless kid you met when backpacking who could strum a few rudimentary chords on the guitar by a beach camp fire and somehow get a group of drunk girls to think he was a bit cute. I see Ed as the natural heir to Noel Gallagher, crafting songs that seem to nick entire melodies from songs that already exist. Ed has an unnerving knack for making everything more beige. He is magnolia paint — or maybe grey if he’s feeling edgy. Ed is music for people who don’t really like music. But you knew that already, didn’t you?
2. Beyonce
It’s such a pity because I had a real soft spot for Destiny’s Child. Beyonce is another of those so-called icons that feels involuntarily thrust upon you. Like we never got a choice or a safe word, we must submit. I command you to acknowledge her genius! Honestly, have you ever read a review where she is not declared the greatest living human of our time? Ignoring the fact that Rhianna is clearly way cooler and heaps more iconic in every way imaginable. Most of what Beyonce does is just… meh. And yes, that includes Crazy in Love — a decent pop song that’s accompanied by near-hysterical levels of hyperbole. If you’d only read about Crazy in Love you’d think it ushered in world peace or the dawn of Aquarius or something actually important. Not, I dunno, something on a par with J-Lo’s Jenny from the Block. Beyonce is our generation’s Diana Ross.
1. Jack White/White Stripes
It’s long overdue that someone staged a mass intervention for anyone who thinks Jack White is any good. Seven Nation Army is his one hit wonder and it is no better or worse than a number of other alt-rock one hit wonders: like Jet’s Are You Gonna Be My Girl? or the Fratelli’s Chelsea Dagger. Yes, he can write crunchy, dirty Zep-lite riffs… but then so can anyone who actually bothered to learn how to play a guitar. The songs beyond the riffs (the hard bit) are shoddily composed, melody-free, brain-farts. His reedy, weedy voice ruining anything approaching competence. He’s no better/actually worse live than countless other club-level blues players. He lucked out turning up in New York just as the Strokes got big. If he wore faded jeans and was from Plymouth you would never have heard of him. He should have had his moment in the sun and then disappeared (like Jet or the Fratellis) but nope, journalists still insist we must bow down to his greatness. Didn’t his new record get Album of the Year somewhere? Do they have ears? It’s beyond dreadful.
So there we have it. A bit of fun, not meant to be taken too seriously! Who would you put on your list?
