Experience dating someone from a matrimony site
As I discussed earlier, my quest on finding led me to opening a matrimony account. Naïve on the complexity of it, I innocently started being myself on calls. And one day I get a call from a person. He seemed good to talk to. I mentioned how the profile was created. We hit it off immediately. Of-course I started romanticizing the entire thing.
There were some series of incidences that happened and we rushed into a relationship. In my head I thought, yes I have a partner who I will eventually marry. In my head it was playing out in that way. Of-course, it wasn’t in his way.
I ended up meeting his parents, he ended up meeting mine. (Very quickly) I didn’t see anything alarming at that time. I thought, oh it is finally nice to have parents onboarded.
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Little did I know, all this would lead to expediting the marriage process. I used to discuss with him on how we should be a team. But his fixation was that we met through a marriage portal so we should married. Which is something I couldn’t understand.
Suddenly there was an enormous pressure on expediting the process. When I started I saying I am not ready, the first response I got was ‘this is a matrimony site not tinder’. I just couldn’t understand this. I heard this dialogue from quite a few people.
The expectations are so drastically different. On dating apps a lot of time the focus is on instant gratification, where as matrimony treats marriage as some process to be completed. My entire world came falling down.
After the break up, I immediately made it clear on the sites that “I believe in things being organic. I am not going as per a timeline.” Of-course I didn’t leave the sites. I decided to modify my communications and communicate my expectations from these sites a bit clearly.
