Nostalgia
After writing this topic I stared at it for about an hour while my mind wondered about all the memories that I’d sacrifice my present to relive.
I have always spent more time trying to relive or rather stay in the past than the present. It always felt and looked more appealing to me. In fact, there are very few memories of mine that I wouldn’t want to revisit.
So this afternoon, I had another heartwarming experience of singing some old songs alongside my father and sister, and a spark of nostalgia hit me like an arrow. Half the lyrics that we had on the tip of our tongues were forgotten but it somehow was an indication of how much time we’ve seen flow by since the last time we did this. Fortunately, the realization of the passage of time hit me at the right time and I had the opportunity to savor every moment that I spent with them thereon, at least each of those moments that gave me peace.
They say ‘You ripe what you sow’ and the seed of music that my father sowed when we were kids has given this family the sweet fruits of bonding and joy. My family has always been a musical one, everywhere we go we take music with us. I have learned the true beauty of poetry and arts through my father’s diverse interest in music and his ability to bring back to life the forgotten artists and poets. He is such an impactful narrator that the words flowing out of his stories and poetry hit you in all the right places, compelling you to fight for the truth or dwell on the aspects of life that we seldom pay heed to.
While singing along to the lyrics of all the old songs in repetition and unison, I found myself spacing out often, getting lost in trying to catch up to the past along with the present that was constantly running out of my hands. I found myself ripped apart in an attempt to achieve the impossible and I realized that I could not make these two parallels meet. I can either dwell in the past or live in the present, I cannot have both at the same time and this realization has always left a great amount of pain in my heart.
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And then it hit me.
Dekha To Yahin Hai Dhundha To Nahin Hai
Pal Jo Yeh Jaanewala Hai Ho HoAanewala Pal Jaanewala Hai
Ho Sake To Iss Mein Zindagi Bitaado
Pal Jo Yeh Jaanewala Hai
The songs that we sang in unison, hit me. They hit me where and when I needed them the most.
It’s like I always live in nostalgia, I live the present as if it has already become my past, I consciously choose to enjoy every bit of it so it becomes a part of the past that I’d want to relive. I make the driest of days worth much thought. It’s as if the idea of wanting to go back to the past helps me live in the moment.
I hope that this piece of writing made sense because even if it didn’t, writing this blog did do a little bit of justice to the part of my life that I live just for the nostalgia of the passing moment. So publishing a blog is always worth a shot.
Until The Next Trail of Thoughts, Sayonara!
