IDDY (Toxic U)
I don’t deserve you,
At least, I don’t think I do:
You’re so kind
And funny
You make my heart fly,
When things get muddy;
I don’t deserve you.
You’re so genuine,
At least when you say you are.
As the last drop of caffeine takes over,
My body shakes just by your voice
Your words;
I kinda wish they weren’t so torn
By the mistakes you make
And the promises you break
I fucking hate you
But I love you.
Oh, I don’t know what
Love even is anymore when
All I feel is my stomach getting sore.
I don’t deserve you.
I wish I did
But, fuck, you are just so good at
Making me feel like my feelings are something
Get Simon Budhoo’s stories in your inbox
Join Medium for free to get updates from this writer.
I should outbid;
I don’t deserve you
I keep telling myself because
You won’t do it for me
You won’t take responsibility
And save me, so just go
Just. GO.
Because I knew it’d be stupid,
I thought I could deny it. But,
I thought we could try it
Again
But, only until when?
Only, until
You hurt me again
You strangle me again
You leave me in a ditch
Where the air in my lungs gets thick
and I wish I could escape
But there’s never an escape
When I’m always just coming back
Again, and Again, and Again,
Until I see you for who you are
Instead of what I want you to be.
And then, I cry myself a river of ecstasy
Because I relied on you to do it for me,
I don’t deserve you.
