THE LAST HOWL….
Grasslands… for me, it has always been a magical land, and the wolves are its magicians. You can understand this only if you live there; only then can you truly experience them.
On the second day after I joined my new job, I was sent to the field. I went with two of my colleagues. Everything was new to me, especially the habitat. It was summer. Before this, I had experience working in forests, but grasslands were completely new to me.
We reached the area where the team had deployed camera traps. Slowly, we entered the landscape, and suddenly, out of nowhere, a female wolf appeared in front of our vehicle. It was the first time I saw a wolf, and the sighting was very close. In that moment, I forgot to click a photograph for documentation. We simply looked at each other.
It felt as if she was saying, “Welcome to our world.”
And from that day on, every day, I experienced the play of a magician in this magical land.
Whenever we went for fieldwork, we carried binoculars. We sat silently, at a distance from the areas where the wolves actually lived. My colleagues could easily identify them and guide me, telling me where they were walking or resting. But when I tried to follow their directions, I could not see anything.
But slowly, I learned.
And then, I began to see.
Each visit felt different. The same hills, the same land, but never the same experience. It felt like a maze, and every time, I lost myself in it.
Somewhere in that silence, I found a strange kind of peace.
When I had once read about Jane Goodall, I had wished to experience even a small part of that silent connection between humans and animals.
Somehow, the universe answered.
It gave me wolves.
Every moment became special. Every sighting made me happy. I felt relaxed, calm. When I saw them, it felt like home.
Wolves are not just animals; they are socially intelligent survivors. A pack has an alpha male and female, like a father and mother in our family. They hunt, travel, and protect each other. Most importantly, they howl not just for communication, but to express emotions. Along with howling, they also communicate through body language and scent marking.
Later, for two months, there were no sightings. No movement. Work continued, and everything seemed normal, but inside, something was missing. Subconsciously, I kept thinking about them. I was afraid something had happened. I was worried all the time, even without realizing it.
Then one day, while I was getting ready for an awareness session, one of our watchers called and said,
“मॅडम, तुम्ही लवकर या, मला लांडगा दिसला आहे.”
I didn’t think. I just left.
When we reached the site, we saw her.
The alpha female.
She was carrying her cub gently in her mouth, shifting it to a safer place.
Time slowed down.
She walked right in front of our vehicle, aware and protective. I sat still, almost frozen. My body didn’t react, but my heart did. My eyes filled with tears, and I didn’t even notice until one rolled down my cheek.
In that moment, I silently prayed
Keep them safe… from everything.
Later, when we shared this in the office, someone said, “You have struck the holy grail of the grasslands.”
Maybe that is true. But for me, it was something else; I had found a bond with this wolf pack.
That day, I felt like going back to my mother, hugging her, and crying… a lot.
From that day on, we started tracking the pack using different tools. The alpha pair took care of their cubs, bringing food and protecting them. The male would sit at a vantage point, watching for any threat, especially when the cubs wandered too far. The female did the same.
They moved strategically, protecting their young, diverting threats with quiet intelligence.
Each cub had a different personality. One wanted to explore everything, one loved to play, one teased the others, and one just wanted to lie down and rest. The more I observed them, the more I wanted to stay with them.
They saw us many times while we collected data from camera traps. They observed us, but never ran away. They knew we were not a threat. I never got to hear their howling of this pack, assuming that we are the threat…
Whenever I saw them, I felt at home, sometimes like a child, sometimes like a mother. I always wanted to be in the field. The city made me feel lonely.
I spoke to them silently, in my mind. I shared everything, my happiness, my sadness, my struggles. I know they never replied, but I felt they listened.
I don’t know how to explain it, but I felt a deep, one-sided bond.
Or maybe… not one-sided.
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I wished this journey would never end, because this lonely wolf( me)was no longer lonely.
Everything felt complete. I was happy. Truly happy.
But that happiness didn’t last long.
Then came the day I didn’t want to face.
I had to leave.
Those days felt like a nightmare.
On my last field visit, it was a summer afternoon. I went to the site with a heavy heart. I was restless and disturbed. While my team collected data, I sat there silently and spoke to them one last time.
I said sorry for leaving.
I told them everything, that my feelings were real, not imagination.
I wanted to cry, but I controlled myself.
Then I made one wish.
With my fingers crossed, I said,
“If this bond is not one-sided… give me one sign.”
Around us, the silence of the grassland remained unchanged.
Meanwhile, the team quietly continued their work, taking about 15 to 20 minutes to collect the data, as if it were just another routine day.
But for me, time felt different in that moment.
Every passing minute carried a quiet expectation… and a growing doubt.
I crossed my fingers and whispered within
If this bond is not one-sided… give me a sign.
I waited.
Nothing.
Finally, after collecting the data, we turned back to leave.
And then
A howl.
Long. Deep. Distant.
But clear.
I stopped.
That was the first time I heard it.
And the last.
For me, it was not just a sound.
It was an answer.
You may read this and think it is an imagination. A story created out of emotion.
But for me, it is neither imagination nor fiction.
It is an experience.
That last howl…
was real.
And so was the bond.
Sneha Kalpande
