Butthole Scorpions

Photo by Leon Pauleikhoff on Unsplash

Me and the boys back in the day — we loved to jam but we were so awful — so awful we called our brand of music ‘Butthole Music’. But whatever, we fuckin’ loved it. Anyway, we were a cover band for quite a long time. A shockingly long time. Perhaps you’ve heard of us?

We started as a Scorpions cover band: Butthole Scorpions.

Then there was our Creed cover band: Butthole Creed.

Some nights we were Butthole Guns N’ Roses and others Butthole Thompson Twins, but we were never Butthole Nickelback. They were already butthole in our book. Why beat a dead horse?

I miss those boys.

Man we had some times.

Man we had some nights.

We let the good times roll through our lack of rhythm and shitty music and I think our fans just loved getting drunk with us, and I don’t regret how often we embarrassed ourselves. At all. Not one fucking iota.

Because one day it struck me like Satan’s flame, what about a reunion? Get the boys back together again?

Well, it wouldn’t be a complete reunion. Our bassist Greg, was dead. Three years ago, impaled on a Bird scooter. We still really don’t know how that happened.

But perhaps we get a guy who looks a lot like Greg. And get on with our documentary.